As a parent of a two year old, or a child who once was two years old, I am assuming the above image is one you are quite familiar with?
My daughter turned two in February and no more than a month passed before some sort of phenomenon occurred. This thing they call “the terrible twos!” I must say, it took me a little off guard. I can still remember the week it all began – just like a switch went off. I was not used to my sweet little girl telling me… make that yelling at me…”NO!” when it came to pretty much anything and everything! I began losing my patience – a lot – and really trying to find creative ways to get my daughter to once again do the simple things she once did for me without the argument… like putting on her shoes or coat to leave the house, or getting into her car seat when I picked her up from daycare. Being close to 9 months pregnant made it all the more difficult to try and stay in control of the situation too. So many times I wanted to just raise that white surrender flag just because I didn’t have the energy to deal with it. Thankfully my husband would step in and support me when I was at my wits end. I also found some valuable information on this whole “terrible twos” stage of development.
This article discusses a great point. Caroline is not purposely trying to be defiant and rebellious but instead is trying to express her need for independence and this is the only way she can effectively communicate that. Also within the article tips for helping your toddler through the terrible twos are discussed including:
- having a regular routine for meals, naps, bedtime, etc. and try to stick to them each day
- offer limited choices only, like ‘would you like apples or oranges for your snack’ and not just ‘what do you want for your snack.’ This helps your toddler feel like he is making some decisions and has power over things, but he isn’t able to choose unacceptable alternatives.
- learn to set limits about things and don’t be surprised when your toddler tries to test those limits to see what he can get away with
- don’t give in to tantrums
- begin to use time-out and taking away privileges as discipline techniques
- provide your toddler with a safe environment that is well childproofed to explore and play in. It really isn’t fair that your toddler should get in trouble for playing with something he isn’t supposed to if you left it within reach.
Of course every parent and child is different and you have to do what works for you. I have noticed a positive change with using the above tips. It’s definitely not always easy to stick with and follow-through (by any means) but it has had a positive effect in our house!
Anyone out there have some useful, tried and true, tricks of the trade they would like to share?