The other day I was having a conversation and I used a nasty word. An acquaintance of mine who was listening to the conversation said, “I can’t believe you just said that, you’re a mother!” Ok, for starters, said acquaintance does not have children, so I’m not really sure what makes her the ‘mother swear police’. Secondly, did I take some sort of oath when I entered into the sisterhood of motherhood that forbade me to use certain words? It’s not like I said the nasty word in front of my children. Should women have to stop doing certain things or acting a certain way because they have children, even if their children are not around? So, I started thinking about some of the escapades that I have had since becoming a mother. After a few brief moments of reflection, a startling thought came into focus…some of my questionable moments over the past couple of years are not questionable because I have given birth, they are questionable because of my AGE! After reaching a certain age are there things that you should just not do? Here are a few of the instances that have given me pause:

Participating in an outdoor dance party with a hip group of college kids,


Shopping at Forever 21 (it’s cheaper than Anthropologie and trendier than Garnet Hill, the GH…don’t knock it till you’ve tried it!)

Dancing on stage at 80s night when you and your friends are the only ones in the club who were alive in the 80s,

Over indulging and throwing up in a snow bank,

Dancing in my car like I’m up in the club, but really I’m on my way to daycare; sometimes the music just makes me look so good,

Going to rock and bowl,


Eating cold pizza for breakfast,

Wearing neon clothing,

Shopping in the BP section of Nordstrom,

Using violet eyeliner,

Getting kicked out of the club,

Using an exclamation point at the end of every sentence in an email to your BFF,


Screaming your head off at the Maroon 5 concert because Adam Levine really does look that good in white jeans,

Obsessively watching Girls,

Referring to myself as “recently out of college”

While I enjoyed every second of these fifteen questionable moments (well not the throwing up in a snow bank, but the over indulging part was delightful) I can’t help but ask myself, am I the weird old lady that young women look at with a mix of disdain and pity? Should I just grow up and accept that in your third decade of life there simply are certain things you should not be doing? The jury is still out, but I don’t have anymore time to think about it because MTV is airing a special about One Direction before they were famous. OMG those guys are 2G2B4G 4COL so BIBI!

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