The other day, I realized I’d been stuffing my nearly two-year-old’s feet into over-stretched 6-12 month infant socks. Oops. With two kids, tons of job applications, numerous volunteer “jobs”, and a new kitten…things get, ahem, overlooked. But I digress. While out shopping, I made amends by letting him pick out whichever socks he’d like to get. He pointed to a 4-pack, I tossed it in the cart, and we headed home. I barely gave them a second look. At home, I noticed this on the label:

Safety Toes?!

Safety Toes?!

Huh?

Huh?

Maybe it’s just me, but I was intrigued. Safety Toes? Socks…”created with my safety in mind?” I had no idea socks could somehow be made safer. Heck, I also couldn’t think of a way to make them more dangerous, either. I was instantly reminded of Lenore Skenazy and her calls for parents to basically chill the heck out on the “child-proof-everything-now!!!” and let kids be (see my previous post about how some have dubbed her “World’s Worst Mother” for this, but that’s a topic for another day!).

Apparently, these babies are lined with a weird, pantyhose-like lining so toddlers can’t somehow get their tiny toes entangled in a stray thread, lose circulation, and end up with amputated digits.

These things feel kinda creepy.

These things feel kinda creepy.

Now, I’ve come across some over the top childproofing items in my time as a mom, including the rubber ducky that alerts mom and dad to too-warm bath water (um, why not use your finger to test it?), and kneepads for crawling babies (don’t get me started…), but I’d never considered the danger that loose sock threads are apparently posing to my child’s sweet little tootsies.

Don't make me feel guilty for stuffing these piggies in socks filled with threads!

Don’t make me feel guilty for stuffing these piggies in socks filled with…gulp…threads!

It seems every time we parents turn around there’s something else we should be worrying about/considering/feeling guilty about. Honestly, I don’t care if the socks have linings. If they’d been plugged as warmer or longer lasting, I’d probably even consider it a plus. However, I’m slowly growing tired of being told my kids are in danger around every corner. At some point, the childproofing goes too far.

So I will continue to put straps on the heavy furniture, make sure the car seats are properly installed, remind them to wear their helmets while riding bikes, and plug the electrical outlets…but that’s pretty much where my child safety panic ends. I refuse to worry about sock threads. And I don’t feel guilty about that. 🙂

"My mom is unconcerned with my dangerous socks."

“My mom is unconcerned with my dangerous socks.”