Hitting my mommy stride

Apr 19, 2013 by

Now that my daughter is right around the corner from two years old, I’m pretty sure I’ve got this mommy thing worked out.


Hahahahahahaha that’s a lie because no one ever figures this stuff out. But I can say, I think I’ve hit something of a stride – a certain comfort level, at least a certain confidence – in my mothering.

I realized I may have hit my mommy stride just this past week while out with my daughter. On Monday, I had hopes of attending the monthly meeting of a local nonprofit I want to get involved in. But the meeting was two hours long. How in the world would Nora ever sit through that? I knew the meeting would be kid-friendly, but with her terrible twos starting to show, Nora’s behavior can be so unpredictable.

Still, I knew I had to go for it. How would she ever learn how to behave and what’s appropriate in certain situations if I never have an opportunity to model it and for her to figure it out? And you know what – she did fantastic. I may have sacrificed every page in my brand new notebook to her doodles and scribbles, but we did it. I got to do something I wanted to do and Nora wasn’t completely miserable. It felt good. I felt on a roll.

A few days later I was at the library for a play-and-story hour, helping the little girl sitting next to Nora at the computers to adjust her headphones so she could hear Mickey Mouse teach her letters. That same afternoon I found myself pushing both Nora and the girl next to her on the swings, because the other mom had her hands full chasing around her other kids. Neither parent in either situation asked me to help their kids; I simply saw a chance to pitch in, and did.

I have to say, a few months ago, I wouldn’t have been able to manage something as simple as even these things seem. I was too frazzled. Too uncertain in my parenting. I hadn’t yet hit my stride. I think a lot of this comfort has to do with her age; now that Nora is older she can be more independent – freeing up a hand or allowing me to take my eyes off her for a minute.

But there’s more confidence there as well. In my daughter, that I can challenge her with more, and push her, and trust her. And in myself, that maybe I’m getting the hang of this mommy thing.

I don’t doubt that I will have many…many…stumbles and trips. But for now – I’m going to take this mommy stride and run with it.

Photo credit: C.Allard

Photo credit: C.Allard

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Christa Allard

Christa never thought she looked particularly good in hats, but like any busy mom she finds herself wearing several of them these days. She stays home with her daughter, Nora full time, and is working towards a nursing degree and certification as a Breastfeeding Counselor. Christa lives in Wethersfield with her family, figuring out motherhood and life as she goes. She writes often about breastfeeding through toddlerhood and the journey to feeling validated in her mothering choices. Christa would like to be a character in an Amy Sherman Palladino sitcom when she grows up.

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  • http://gravatar.com/melissamuszynski melissamuszynski

    Love this post and i totally get the mom stride. When its there you just have to keep it rolling. At times i feel the stride too and it sure feels good! :) good for you!

  • Kate Street

    What a great post! I’m still waiting for my mommy stride to kick in….any minute now…. 😉

  • Vivian

    I think this is a great post and an important reminder to moms that things DO eventually get easier. I was a freaking wreck for the first two years of my kids’ lives – the only thing that kept me going was my very predictable routine of doing nothing but work and kid stuff. Daddy/Mommy time was effectively non existent, as was “me” time or even exercise time. But at 2+ years(2 years and 2 months, to be exact), something CLICKED. Evening routine got easier and shorter, the kids were a little more self sufficient, and I found that I had some more free time. It felt great.

    There have been some stumbling points since then (we are, as we speak, re-sleep-training due to some setbacks caused by a particularly bad stretch of night terrors), but overall, I keep reminding myself that if I stick with it, I’ll eventually find my “stride” again!

  • Jen Seiderer

    This is great! Glad you’ve found it!

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