It’s been awhile since we unleashed some True Confessions and I am feeling the need! So here we go:
* I’ve already confessed that my baby enjoys dog food and dog treats. It turns out he’s non-discriminating, and also enjoys cat food. We keep our cat food in the bathroom and sometimes I’ll hand him a handful so I can dry my hair in peace.
* My dog pooped in my basement recently. I’m waiting for my husband to discover it so he’ll clean it up.
* I get headaches just about every month. I think it’s the only way I can truly fathom getting a break…but that doesn’t even work.
* I fully resent that my husband can go out on his bike for hours at a time, whereas I have to co-ordinate and plan for time away.
* I often feel Moms who work have more family balance and more freedom. It seems like it’s easier for them to leave their children. Correct me if I’m wrong.
* My baby is whining for me right now as I’m writing this and I’m pissed my husband is watching a movie instead of rescuing me.
* The only reason I don’t drink more is because I can’t handle Mothering my kids with a hangover.
* I just yelled at my husband to take the baby the f*ck to sleep so I can write this blog post.
* I’ve been exhausted and in pain all week. Everyone thinks it’s my lyme disease acting up…and yet, I’m still in denial….’cause f*ck lyme disease.
* I really enjoy using the f-word.
* Yesterday I was feel the yearning to wear some really comfortable denim and I was led to go look into my old maternity clothes. I found an AWESOME pair of capris that fit perfectly AND comfortably and my ego has NO TROUBLE wearing maternity pants. In fact I think I’ll take them to my favorite dress maker and have her sew some funky fabric over the stomach band. And further more, I think I’ll shop at Motherhood to buy more comfortable clothes and have funky fabric sewn in them. ‘Cause f*ck zippers and buttons! I’m so over them! (Yes, I’m a size 4 and I PREFER maternity pants! Rock on, me!)
* While shopping at Carter’s the other day I complained for the second time about the stupid-ass sayings on their clothes. There was a cute tractor jumper that I knew my 21 month old would LOVE but it was coupled with another jumper that said “Chicks Dig Me.” I said to the cashiers “Chicks dig me? Really? He’s not even 2!” They told me to complain on-line. And dammit, I will! I HATE the sayings on Carter’s clothes!
* I have one phone in my big house and I will never rush to get to it. Ever.
* It’s 8:35 pm as I write this and it’s feeling past my bed time. Good night.