I spent this past weekend packing up all my daughter’s baby clothes and put them away in storage. I have been putting this off mainly because of time constraints and knowing it would be a big task.
I also put off this chore because my heart could not do it. Then my nesting powers started to kick in. Although it was sad to say good-bye to the tiny baby clothes my daughter lived in for the first few years of her life, with a baby boy on the way in a few months, I had to pack up the pink pajamas, lace dresses, and satin shoes to make way for boy stuff. I also can’t help but wonder if we’ll ever have another little girl running around in need of these outfits again.
Cleaning up my daughter’s belongings that I have kept since her birth stirred up many emotions (or maybe I’m just unusually hormonal these days?). We were so blessed that most of my daughter’s things came from friends and family members. Going through the piles, I even found gender neutral and a few boys clothes we received from the generosity of others. As I came across some of the gifts I received at my baby shower, I was reminded of how I was so happily unaware as to what I was in for as a first-time mom. Finding stuff from the hospital sent me back to my labor experience and our child’s birth. I can’t believe it’s been three years already!
Not only am I making room for baby by clearing out the nursery and freeing up closet space, I am freeing up space in my mind. I am putting aside thoughts of how motherhood will be a bit more complicated with two kids and I am thinking only of how great everything will be. Yes, that momnesia I wrote about a while back is in full force. I feel like I am starting again with a clean slate, with that same naïveté I had before my firstborn came into the world and turned it upside down. These children will love each other, share with each other, and most of all, learn from each other. But I also know they will fight excessively and secretly plot to overthrow their parents like siblings inevitably do.
As I packed up the boxes containing the first three years of my daughter’s life, I also sent away with them memories of post-partum anxiety; frustrations over colic; and delirium due to sleep deprivation. Instead, I am filling the nursery once again with hope and excitement for this new addition to our family. I am a lot tougher now, this second baby won’t shake me because I have experience and a supportive network to get me through it. So I say to my second baby and the challenges he will bring with him on the way: Bring it! We are ready for you.