Alternate title: Run On Sentences 4 Lyfe

I know. It’s still February, we’re all still freezing and another snow storm is scheduled to pummel us on Monday. Why am I talking about summer? Well, first, because OMG ENOUGH WITH THE SNOW ALREADY.

And secondly, this is the time of year those of us with school-aged children do the what-the-eff-do-we-do-with-them-during-summer-vacation dance. Admittedly, Olivia will only be five this summer so we have the option of sending her to Audrey’s daycare for summer break. However, though the arrangement is only temporary, the cost is positively soul-crushing.

We’ve begun to seek out and weigh other options to see if anything else would fit our needs and plus also cost FEWER DOLLAR BILLZ, Y’ALL.

There are some great summer camps that are pretty reasonably priced. But Audrey isn’t old enough for most and Olivia will only be five and hahahahahahahahahahahahaLOLZ NOT PUTTING HER ON A GIANT SCHOOL BUS NOPE. Yes, I realize she will be in kindergarten in the fall. And that she will have the option of taking the bus to school and many of her preschool friends already ride the bus and it would make my life easier and it’s just not happening, okay? I am terrified of putting her on a bus and I’m also a car seat freak and she’ll be in a five-point harness until she is 15 and ANOTHER THING I would also make my tall-as-me 12-year-old nephew still sit in a backless booster if I could and YES I am FULLY AWARE that this is just one of my Freak Flag Things. I’m fine with it. So. To sum up? No school bus. Moving on.

There is a camp run by my town that has several pluses: 1) they accept three-year-olds as long as they’re potty trained. 2) no school buses necessary. 3) crazy affordable.

Side note: You may be wondering why I’m considering a place that would accept Audrey since she’s already in child care. Well, MONEY and MAN, would it be nice to have them in the same place if even for two short months.

Back to this toddler loving, bus averse, inexpensive dreamy summer camp. It sounds perfect, right? My husband was practically victory dancing around the house when we sat back for a minute and thought about this:

Bat Princess, at your service!

Bat Princess, at your service!

She’s still so little. Are we ready to send her off to the wolves, er, I mean big girl camp? So what if she’s potty trained. Look at that smoosh. THAT IS A NEWBORN BABY RIGHT THERE. Obviously too young for camp. Even a camp with no buses. My husband wasn’t quite convinced.

Then we watched Criminal Minds. (I’ve just recently been allowed by said husband to resume watching this show as my, um, imagination tends to run away with me and I’m constantly IRRATIONALLY afraid of kidnapping and murder and I know, based on this entry alone you are all SHOCKED by this admission, but believe it or not, I’m MUCH better than I used to be. Or not. Whatever.) Last night’s episode was about a four-year-old little girl being left in the care of a trusted babysitter and well, let’s just say NO CAMP THIS YEAR.

We’ve come to the conclusion that some things are worth paying for when it comes to the safety of your children.

Oh, and that maybe I’m not as ready for Criminal Minds as I thought.

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