Yesterday I was in Goodwill with my daughter looking at some awesome windsor style dining room chairs when out of NOWHERE, a large wooden shelf came crashing down on my freaking HEAD and then my shoulder. It was one of those “Did this just happen? Is this real life?” situations. The only person in a store full of customers and employees who even said anything to me was my four-year-old.

Hey, thanks. At least somebody cares about me. Ow.

Two more quick things before I go put more ice on my arm…

1) Did you know that kids can get croup in April? SURPRISE! They can! Am I the only person who thought this was a cold weather illness? It’s not. Steamy showers, sleeping upright with a 37 lb toddler on my lap, cool mist humidifier, oral steroids and several nebulizer treatments later, the cough is less horrifying and the little one is back to daycare.

2) Did you know that ticks are ALREADY OUT? We’ve had, what, three warm days? Last night I found a deer tick embedded in Olivia’s head. Parenting achievement: UNLOCKED. This was a first for us and I’m not trying to be dramatic when I tell you it was a nightmare. Trying to hold a screaming preschooler still while she is thrashing about, scared to death, as my husband attempts to remove THE ENTIRE TICK DON’T FORGET THE MOUTHPARTS, PEOPLE. Mouth parts. That is what they’re actually called. As if this whole situation isn’t gross enough already. Anyway, it was a successful extraction and now we have the fun assignment of watching her for symptoms of Lyme Disease. SO MUCH FUN, YOU GUYS.

Annnnnnd I’m out. Oh wait, if you don’t have a tick key? GET ON THAT SHIT. Life saver.

Tweezers? Where we're going we don't NEED TWEEZERS.

Tweezers? Where we’re going we don’t NEED TWEEZERS.

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