All day long most parents I know, including myself are constantly worrying about what we cannot do for our kids or promise them.

We constantly worry about what we are doing right or wrong and to be honest: IT IS DOWN RIGHT EXHAUSTING!

So today I decided to take a positive approach to parenting and talk about the things I CAN promise my kids will happen or they will get from me as a parent.

TO MY WONDERFUL CHILDREN I PROMISE YOU THE FOLLOWING:

1. You can always puke and shit on me. I will never run from your bodily functions. This is the sign of true love. From day one we will run to cup your puke as opposed to the natural reaction to run.

2. You will get tons of kisses. This is no big deal to both of you now as you come running for my snuggles but I promise when you are in your twenties I will still kiss you on the face. I will compromise and do this only in the confines of my home or yours.

3. I will fight for you to have a good education but I will not fight with teachers who are doing there jobs. I will 95% of the time believe the teacher over you…kids are known liars and the sooner you know that the better, LOL.

4. We will make some great memories. I will not always be the tyrant but sometimes, just sometimes I will be the fun mother. I can’t say when or how but you will get glimpses into a carefree mother at some point in your life.

5. I will embarrass the crap out of you. I know most parents may be offended when the kids want nothing to do with them, but my husband and I are slightly excited about being able to have a person care that much about us embarrassing them. You must be warned we will take advantage of this. So when dad shows up in a broken down pinto in a stained white tank top, cut off jean shorts and a mullet to pick you up from high school you may not be laughing….but we will.

6. I will let you be the person who you are and not who I want you to be. I want to continually strive and make sure I am not projecting what I want for you as opposed to what you want and who you are. Do not get me wrong I will steer, guide and give consequences to unacceptable behavior but I will try to remember that it is your life not mine.

7. I will be open about controversial topics and cannot help it. Your mother is an over the top extrovert who has realized that being open about everything has made her life easier. So I will be open about sex, drugs and rock and roll. When I say open I will not condone but will talk about it so you will hopefully make smart decisions.

8. One day when you are an adult and have children of your own, I will open up about all the shenanigans and fun your Dad and I had before we had to become “responsible adults’. You will be shocked to know that your parents were actually fun people too!

9. I will always love you. No matter what happens in life, good or bad I will always love you. I may not “like” you after some bad decisions but I will always love you unconditionally.

Cannot wait to embarrass you two!

Cannot wait to embarrass you two!

So while I am only human and can make many mistakes over the years, I will promise the following to you.

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