Please pardon me, but I have no profound thoughts to impart to you in today’s post.  All I have is poop on the mind.  Or, in the case of my baby, the lack thereof.  I don’t know how it happened, one minute everything was working great and the next, it’s like someone flipped the off switch in his digestive tract. I’ve been going through the many stages of constipation the past two weeks:

Bewilderment – Gee, I wonder why the baby isn’t pooping?

Memory lapse – Has it been 5 days or 6 days?

Worry/Panic – What’s it going to look like?  How big? Where will it happen and when?

I had to start turning down social engagements out of fear when a poop-losion would occur.  Imagine how ridiculous this sounds:  “Oooh sorry I can’t attend your really fun event because my kid is backed up and I’m afraid he’ll do a diaper explosion any minute.”  True story.

We tried every natural remedy that has worked well for us in the past.  But nothing. Then the doctor told me it was time to pull out the big guns. My response was: I have to put what?  Where?!?!?   I made my husband do it.  And it worked.  But then, he didn’t go again, for days.  I was starting to picture myself having to follow him around in college with a glycerin suppository.

Then I decided I was being ridiculous.  He seemed absolutely fine and happy, I was worrying over what was probably a small health issue.  I needed to take the kids out to do a fun activity.

So we went to pick pumpkins.

pumpkins

 

And it was great.

 

poo

little witch

 

And then he pooped.  Not at the pumpkin patch, but a day later.

Things seemed to be on the up and up again.  But then, the “Blood Moon” hit and my daughter turned into a live depiction of the photo above.  According to Wikipedia, the Blood Moon that occurred last week was the second of four total lunar eclipses that will occur in the next year.  There are many religious prophecies out there regarding the Blood Moon, but all I know is that in my house when there is a full moon, crazy shit happens.  There are tantrums, tempers flaring, and disruptions to the sleep cycle. And the kids are affected, too.

eclipse_total_espanek_10-27-2004-e1358526755212

 

It was not my finest parenting week.  My patience was very thin.  The more indignant my daughter became, the louder I would yell.  Mr. No-Poop was waking up an hour earlier than usual in addition to waking up every two hours to feed. I was exhausted and touched out.  I’m pretty sure that everything I was doing and saying that week would be totally wrong according to all the parenting experts.  It is just so hard to be the pillar of strength and reason when you are at your wit’s end.

But I know my child is not too scarred.  After one particularly heated argument with my daughter in the car, I advised her that we should just not talk for the rest of the 30 minute car ride.  When we got home, the first thing out of her mouth was, “You are a great mom.”  Oh this girl. Thank goodness she forgives my imperfections.  Now if only I could do the same for myself.

How was your week?  Did you make it through the full moon ok?

 

 

 

 

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