I haven’t watched the nightly news in about 7 years. Seriously. Honey and I don’t watch the news around the kids because often there is information that is above their understanding or distrubing, or both. We share local and world news that is relevant to them in our own way at their level. Besides, quite honestly the local and world news is depressing. I can’t listen to it anymore. Truthfully, this means I am often uninformed about current events (unless I pick up something on NPR in my 10-minute commute to work, which I actually don’t have anymore). I need to find a better way to get my information on a daily basis that doesn’t come with shock value or political bias and will gladly take suggestions. My lack of effective news media outlets got me thinking about how much better news would be if it was run by moms.
- The 5 o’clock news wouldn’t be at 5 o’clock, it would be at whatever evening time was most convenient for you. Read: not during witching hour when you just got home from work and are dealing with homework and dinner prep.
- The lead story on the news would also be catered to you and would detail all the important information you needed to prep for the next day:
In Wethersfield Public Schools tomorrow there will be a spirit day. All 2nd graders need to dress as their favorite cartoon character. In related news, the Silas Deane Marshalls has Mickey Mouse shirts in various sizes for $9.99.
- The weather forecast would not only give the temperature and chance for precipitation, but also a real-life account of what the humidity feels like (“it’s don’t bother doing your hair humid”). Also, the meteorologist would tell you what you and your kids should wear the next day.
It’ll be drizzly in the mid-50s tomorrow so mom don’t forget your umbrella in the car again. 6th grade boys it’s the perfect weather for shorts and a t-shirt, and teenagers it means there is absolutely no need to wear a coat of any kind.
- The scrawl at the bottom of the screen would be news that other moms wrote in to praise themselves, other moms, or their kids.
Johnny scored the winning goal at last night’s soccer game, Lisa baked a casserole for a sick neighbor, Jenny remembered to pick up the dry cleaning, Timmy got an A on his math test.
- The sports section would supply enough information so that you could have a seemingly intelligent conversation about your spouse’s favorite team. This would win you major wife points, but wouldn’t actually require you to watch sports (unless that’s your thing).
Red Sox won, Yankees lost, Mets had the night off. Someone struck out, someone hit a homer.
- The news would always tend with a tear-inducing feel good story. We moms all know a good cry feels great every now and again.
If only a news outlet like this existed. I might start watching again.