One thing that motherhood will teach you is that there are things that are important to you as a person; lessons and qualities that you would like your children to embrace as they get older. Here is a list of 10 key things that I would like my kids to know; some are more superficial than others, but if I have done nothing other than instill these 10 key fundamental qualities in my children, then I will have done a decent job as a mom.


Be silly and don’t be afraid to dance like a fool.

  1. Always look out for your brother / sister – this will not apply to everyone, but to me, it is the most important piece of advice I will ever give my kids. There is no one in your lives that will ever be as close to you as your twin brother / sister. You have been together since Day 0 (conception), and you will be together much longer than you will be with your own mom and dad. Your twin bond is unique; unlike any other sibling bond out there. Watch out for each other, always protect each other, and remember that you have been BFFs from the start.
  2. Don’t be afraid to be alone – there are times in life when you will be alone. Don’t be afraid or uncomfortable – learn to appreciate silence, and solitude. It will make life a much less lonely journey.
  3. Be silly – life is way too short to be serious or angry. Be silly, enjoy what you’re doing, and see points #4 and #5.
  4. Don’t be afraid to dance like a fool – in middle school, we had these dances every other Friday. Like most middle schoolers, we’d start the night with boys huddled in one corner of the gym, and girls huddled in the other. One brave boy (I don’t remember who he is) would get out on the dance floor and dance like a fool. As snot-nosed pre-teens, we’d laugh and make fun of him, but secretly, we girls thought he was kind of cool because his crazy dance moves always got the rest of the crowd going. Be the kid who is not afraid to dance like a fool.
  5. Smile freely and genuinely – when you don’t smile, people may think that you are: snobbish, judgmental, too serious, excessively introverted. While people with these traits (at least the serious or introverted ones) might be nice people, they don’t instantly put people at ease. When you smile freely and genuinely, you give off a sense of warmth and calm, and people will naturally gravitate towards you. If you put others at ease, you will also be at ease.
  6. Be kind to everyone – people in general like to be treated with respect and there is no reason not to treat someone with respect, even if you do not like them. Be kind to everyone, no matter who or how old they are, or what walk of life they have taken. There is very little downside to being kind – the worst that can happen is that they just don’t give a sh*t.
  7. Be loyal to those who matter – unless you are a politician, it is much more important in life to build a few deep friendships than many broad friendships. Find those friends, family, and colleagues whom you can trust and be trustworthy and loyal to those people – in your darkest times, these are the people who will stand by your side no matter what happens.
  8. Try something you never thought you could do – you are capable of doing a lot more than you think you can do. Stretch yourself and try something that you NEVER thought you could do – you will surprise yourself.
  9. Learn to play the piano (literally) – there are very few skills that are as socially and emotionally versatile as playing the piano – I don’t mean knowing how to play by reading a score; I mean knowing how to sit down and really JAM. People will think that you’re cool for being able to just sit down and play, you’re able to express your thoughts and emotions in a non verbal way, it’s a great way to break the ice and/or pass time, AND if nothing else, you can get a job as a lounge player (not to mention that if you ever aspire to be involved with music, knowing the piano provides you with a great foundation).
  10. Don’t waste your money unnecessarily – I am not saying do not spend your money; I am saying do not spend it unnecessarily. If you decide you want to buy something, shop around and shop smart. Put any extra money that you might have spent by not shopping smart into a rainy day jar. Then use it for a rainy day.
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