The return of the snuggler

Aug 28, 2015 by

I’m not exactly sure when my daughter decided I give her too many kisses, but it’s something I hear often now, and I don’t like it.

Doesn’t she realize that the moment I became her mom, smothering her with kisses became my job?

We used to snuggle daily, at least every morning after she had weaned. After over two and a half years of nursing, morning snuggles became our replacement, and after we would both stumble downstairs and onto the couch, she’d crawl into my lap for a snuggle while we both took each other in and slowly woke up together. That routine gradually tapered as she and I both went to school, when everything just felt busier.

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What happened when I pulled instead of pushed

Aug 14, 2015 by

Meltdowns usually go like this: she screams, hits, kicks, cries…it often escalates into what seems like an out-of-body experience. Then there’s me, attempting to stand firm, hold my ground. I don’t want to lose it (though sometimes I do) and try really hard to appear like I’m in control of the situation. I’m the parent, after all, and there are times when she doesn’t have a choice but to listen; I like to think I’m fair, but sometimes she doesn’t have a choice…right? But she’s four, and I’m figuring this out as I go, and these meltdowns with their big emotions tend to bring out the worst in both of us and expose our weaknesses.

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Preschooler words

Jul 31, 2015 by

I’ve been documenting the cute mispronunciations my daughter has used as a toddler, and I’d be remiss not to include the verbal gold of her preschool years. We’ve lost a few of my favorites as her vocabulary expands, but the new words she has learned have also paved the way for some of my favorite mispronunciations to date:

About = without

Instruction workers = construction workers

Molds = cookie cutters

Newseum = museum

Ferris wheel = cartwheel

Imbatashins = invitations

Micks = mix

Wicks = whisk

I can’t know how to do it = I don’t know how to do it

Conversations with my daughter can sometimes be infuriating (can the questions just stop, already??) but mostly they’re my favorite part of the day, especially when she injects this cuteness into them. I don’t ever want to forget how great it feels as a mother to hear her learn and grow every day.

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No more excuses

Jul 17, 2015 by

Nora didn’t sleep through the night until she was past one and a half years old. This was mostly due to the fact that I nursed her on demand for that time (and even a year past that) which meant if she wanted to nurse in the middle of the night, I’d do so.

However, when my husband would put Nora to sleep while we were weaning – so that I wasn’t there for the temptation to nurse to sleep – bedtime became a series of excuses for why I wasn’t the one to put her to bed. This pattern continued well past weaning. When I decided to go back to school, the excuse became an easy one – Mom has to go to school tonight. We used this excuse whether I was meeting up with a friend, fitting in a Pilates class or, in fact, heading to class or to study, because Nora understood that school was important to me and for our family and for her it was an “acceptable” reason for me not to snuggle her to sleep.

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Priorities

Jul 3, 2015 by

It had been in the back of my mind all day, the nagging reminder of the studying I would have to do that night towards my upcoming exam. My daughter and I had a nice day together, and I tried to remain present and enjoy, yet I still felt mildly distracted and it had been awhile since we had truly connected. I had missed bedtime the five nights prior between class and studying, but that night it was my turn. As we snuggled on the couch while dinner cooked, my daughter asked, “Where do you have to go tonight?”

For the first time in nearly a week, I got to answer, “Nowhere tonight, sweetie. We get to read stories and snuggle together before bed. Would you like that?”

As she nodded, my daughter smiled and leaned in closer. “Can you stay a little longer tonight?” she asked hopefully, thinking of how I usually stay beside her until she’s dropped off to sleep.

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