This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Feb 26, 2015 by

Parents everywhere know that parenting can be summed up into 8 little words…

Forgive me for a moment, because I’m about to go on an epically first world rant…Why, why, why do my children insist on destroying everything in my house???

I’m having a moment this week because my wife recently informed me that after 15 years of going to college, grad school, first apartment, new jobs, second apartment, first house, marriage, kids, another kid, and more new jobs, she needs a couple years to just *be*.

When she said this, I was all…

::blankstare::

Because, as you can gather from the list above, I’m not really a “just be” kinda gal. Forward progression is my thing and I’m thinking we should round out that list with ‘second house’ right about now.  But, I like my marriage and my wife is pretty cute so we are going to try being for a bit.

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Ode To a Working Mom

Feb 19, 2015 by

I’m away on business this week, as I am often enough. I sat down tonight to write all about how much being a travelling mom can suck. How I miss my babies and feel extreme guilt wondering just how much travel is too much, and how they will think back to this time when they are adults (“Sure, mommy was great, but she was never around”…).  But as I contemplated all of those things, I had to stop and think about the moment.

In this moment, as I return from a working dinner 1500 miles away from my sweet little family, my children are fed, teeth brushed, books read, and tucked lovingly into their beds.  They are feeling safe, secure, and taken care of.  Their world continues spinning – lunches packed, shuttled to school and various activities, dinners made – despite my distance, and that is all due to the most amazing working mom I know.

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Safe Zone

Feb 12, 2015 by

Right around the time I was in high school, the “Safe Zone” movement caught momentum.  Often in the form of stickers on classroom doors or pins on teacher’s shirts, the Safe Zone label indicated that a person or space was a place of safety, acceptance, and support.  As you can tell by the image, this message was primarily targeted at the LGBT community. Even though I wasn’t out in high school and never felt the need to seek out a Safe Zone for any specific comfort or support, just knowing they were there brought me a wonderful peace of mind.  I enjoyed my algebra class a little more because my teacher had that sticker on his desk.

But what if we could expand the concept? Couldn’t everyone benefit from having a Safe Zone? A place where you could fully and simply be embraced?

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Embracing It

Feb 5, 2015 by

I’ve been a Type A planner and perfectionist straight from the womb. Life for me is filled to the brim with plans, goals, and determined outcomes.  Well, sometimes. In my dream world. And sure, occasionally in reality too.  But mostly, my life is a messy compilation of beautiful imperfections. A whole host of happy surprises, that didn’t all start out quite so happy.

I distinctly remember being in middle school and feeling like I couldn’t wait to grow up and enjoy the perfect life I had planned out in my head.  Fun, adorable, husband and 3 boys. I was going to be a school psychologist and the summers off with my kids were going to be awesome!

As you all well know, none of that came to fruition, and I couldn’t be more glad. As it turns out, the family I got was exactly the one I was meant to have.

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A Memory

Jan 29, 2015 by

I’m so glad I kept a journal in my early days of parenting, when we were first meeting our children, and learning the foster parent dance. There are some magical moments caught in there…

I noticed early on that it was very powerful to say to my son, “I am glad you are here.” I told him over and over and over again – sometimes 10 or 20 times a day.

“I’m glad you are here.”
“I’m so happy to know you.”
“You are welcome here.”

For the first 6 to 9 months, he would respond by shouting “Don’t say that!” or “I’m not tryin’ to hear you!” But regardless of his words, his voice would soften and the tantrums would calm.

After that he would mostly ignore me or respond with an oh-so-pleasant eye roll and “I kno-wah. You said that before.”

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