sometimes we crack: when working moms max out

Jul 24, 2014 by

 

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All moms, especially working moms, have this habit of building and piling on our “to do” lists with great fervor and then trying to achieve the ever-expanding list with perfection every day. If we don’t complete every task, we feel unaccomplished or even (gulp) like failures. We seek to perform so much multi-tasking with such high expectations, sometimes we crack.

Yes, I said it….sometimes we crack.

Raise your hand: how many working moms do you know that seem on the edge of a nervous breakdown? Maybe that mom is you. There are countless articles about the depression and anxiety that seems chronic with trying to be a supermom. Like this one, this one, and this one. Yet, we still seem uncomfortable talking about it.

We need a break from the level we are trying to function at.

Trying for that little girl

Jul 17, 2014 by

Seriously, we are not.

We are most definitely not ever trying to have another kid. In fact, we are certainly never, ever, not ever in a million years going to have another baby (note: I didn’t say “kid”). Ever.

But people will still ask.

We have 2 boys and we are totally fulfilled. Our family is complete. We are so sure that we got rid of any donor sperm in storage. I had a medical procedure that solidifies my inability to have another child. My wife is 47 and was on bed rest for 8 weeks of her pregnancy with our oldest. There will be no more babies coming from us.

But people still ask.

And when they ask, they seem to think we’re being short-sighted. Or maybe they can still convince us. Maybe they think it’s not too late. “Don’t you now want that adorable little girl that you can dress in pink and have tea parties with?”

Kids and Hot Cars

Jul 10, 2014 by

Many years ago, I was watching a news report on a toddler who died when his mother forgot him in her car. I remarked aloud with disgust and pure criticism of this mom. “How could any parent just forget his or her child? That’s the most ridiculous and irresponsible thing I’ve ever heard.”

My friend (a mom of 3 girls) was watching with me and looked at me with a level stare. She said, “don’t judge, Holly, don’t judge this mom who may have done 1,000 things right and loved her child to the end of the earth but who had made the most terrible, awful mistake that she will never forgive herself for.”

I was a little stunned. I was surprised that another mom could defend a parent who – as I saw things at the time – had just murdered her child.

Unprepared, Disorganized, Newbie Baseball Mom

Jun 26, 2014 by

There I was,  driving the 15 minutes to my in-laws with one hand on the wheel and the other handing holding my son’s baseball underwear out the window to dry – alternating between the sunroof and the driver’s side window to get the best drying effect.

It did occur to me that this wasn’t my finest mom moment. I realized that I was falling a little short on the prepared baseball (or any sport) mom thing.

Maybe other baseball moms were more on top of cycling through laundry on a 3-day baseball weekend. Maybe other moms weren’t putting half-wet cup underwear and pants on their child 5 minutes before game time. Maybe other moms weren’t opening their trunks and slapping their foreheads realizing the folding chairs were in the other car.

Now, I am not the most organized, prepared, together mom to begin with. Add some baseball scheduling into the mix, I’m definitely not a superstar.

Winning arguments

Jun 19, 2014 by

“WHY ARE YOU ARGUING WITH ME?!!?”

“WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING!?!!? WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THAT YOU MAY BE WRONG?!?!”

That’s what I wanted to shout at my 7 year old last night when our discussion about where he insisted he left his tablet ended when I found it in the exact place I was sure he had left it. He asserted that he was still right and someone else must have put it there. That was within seconds of when our other conversation about outside playtime and bath time came to an impasse.

I’m tired of arguing with my kid.

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