The More You Know!

Apr 17, 2014 by

Yesterday I was in Goodwill with my daughter looking at some awesome windsor style dining room chairs when out of NOWHERE, a large wooden shelf came crashing down on my freaking HEAD and then my shoulder. It was one of those “Did this just happen? Is this real life?” situations. The only person in a store full of customers and employees who even said anything to me was my four-year-old.

Hey, thanks. At least somebody cares about me. Ow.

Two more quick things before I go put more ice on my arm…

1) Did you know that kids can get croup in April? SURPRISE! They can! Am I the only person who thought this was a cold weather illness? It’s not. Steamy showers, sleeping upright with a 37 lb toddler on my lap, cool mist humidifier, oral steroids and several nebulizer treatments later, the cough is less horrifying and the little one is back to daycare.

Running on Faith – My Messy Beautiful

Apr 10, 2014 by

I know I’m not the only parent out there who grew up in less than idyllic circumstances. I know there are many, many souls who’ve had it harder, worse, who’ve lost more than me, who’ve been knocked down more and found a way to get back up again.

And while I’m not happy other parents have suffered, I’m grateful that I’m not alone. They’ve given me courage and taught me grace and made me humble.

I grew up surrounded by noise, anger, abuse, addiction, poverty and – because of all that – shame. How sad is that? I was ashamed of my life, of my family, of myself. As a little girl, I dreamed of the life and family I would have one day. The glorious normal, loving, secure family. And so I fought for it. I pushed my way out of that old life and toward something new. I wasn’t going to be like that. I was going to be more. I clung to that picture of my grown-up life and, though it was only in my mind, it was real. They were out there, this husband and these children. Waiting for me. I just needed to get to them.


Apr 3, 2014 by

They say when you marry someone, you also marry his/her family. Yikes, right? I mean, we’ve all heard the stories about the dreaded in-laws. What am I saying? I’m sure most of us tell these stories.

Burn! [source:]
Burn! [source:]


Please don’t hate me, but I’m afraid I cannot join the throngs of men and women who rue the day they gained a bonus family member upon marrying their spouse. From what I hear, I’m pretty sure I hit the mother-in-law jackpot. Which works out so well for me, since she is the only mother figure in my life now and the only grandmother my children will ever have.

Loving on her baby girls.
Loving on her baby girls.


The Sass

Mar 27, 2014 by

Wow, guys. Just… WOW. I swear to you, my children must have secret meetings during which they pull up a spreadsheet and go over who is in charge of making me crazy that day/week/month/year.

The last three years belonged to the reigning champion of Audreying Around, Miss Audrey. But, LO, THE TIDES HAVE TURNED.

Audrey is segueing nicely into a normal, mostly sweet and awesome, periodically tantruming and always strong-willed three-year-old. It’s been pretty glorious, I have to say. I like her quite a bit.

I mean, come on. LOVE HER.

Olivia, however, has seen the opening and lunged for it. I mean, with ALL HER MIGHT. I mean, really, given the legacy she has to live up to, it’s no wonder she came out of the gate strong.

I don’t know where my mild-mannered, loving, sweet, polite preschooler went, but she’s been replaced by a pod person.

It Gets Better

Mar 20, 2014 by

I just want to let you know. If you’re struggling with a newborn who won’t stop crying, if you’re crying more than she is, if the older sibling of this child gets far less attention simply because you are stretched so thin you are about to break, if you are being crushed by the weight of the guilt of that, by the feelings of inadequacy, anger, sadness, if you forget to feed your family until they remind you at bedtime, if you can’t remember the last bath you gave (or took),  if everyone keeps telling you that the baby is just in a phase, is colicky, will sleep through the night ANY MINUTE and you want to stab them because it’s been over two years and still no sleep, if you are so deep in the weeds right now that you feel like you will never surface, that surely you will run out of air, I want to tell you something. I feel you. I have walked a million miles in your shoes. I have felt that despair. I have wondered what was wrong with me. I have wondered if it would ever get better.

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