Author: Wilder Zandonella

Dear Rude Complementary Lady

Hi, my name is Wilder. Do I have a sign on my head that gives you permission to talk about my body? I do not know you, and you do not know me. We had a quick exchange at a fundraiser, but only because your friend was being a B, and felt the need to talk down to my friends and I about us apparently taking the table she had reserved. You then proceeded to tell me how beautiful I was, and then ask if I was pregnant. Nope. Not even close. But I did just have a baby a few weeks ago. A few being 12, which honestly is not that long ago. It was like yesterday actually. I don’t know why because your friend was being a total B, that you then felt it necessary to divert the attention to me, and my post-pregnancy, apparently pregnant looking body. Do you know how long I looked for a dress today that I would feel comfortable wearing? For the exact reason you noticed, I really did not want to wear a fitted dress. But I couldn’t find anything else I liked, and everything I own cuts me in the gut funny. My husband told me I looked great, and that everyone knows I just had a baby and will think I look great too. Why do I even care...

Read More

The Moment You Hear Your Baby Has Been Abused

Yup. You heard me, abused. Every emotion you could ever imagine comes rushing over you all at once. You start to panic. Sweat. Shake. Feel your internal temperature rising. Cry. Yell. Become confused. Feel like you are going to go ballistic on the person who is responsible for this. One of your worst fears as a parent suddenly becomes true. How the hell could something like this allegedly happen to my child? Under the care of people who are supposed to have the best interest of children in mind, at all times, no matter what. Well, guess what, it happens. It happens every day, across the world. You just honestly never think that it will happen to your family. Ever. Almost four months ago, I received a phone call telling me that our son was witnessed being force-fed and hit in the head by one of the teachers in his daycare. Like seriously, are you fucking kidding me? As a mom, I have a natural instinct to want to protect my children. We all do; it is ingrained in us as parents. Intellectually I know that I cannot protect him from everything of the world. My heart tells me otherwise though. My son will NEVER experience heartache because he is too perfect; my son will NEVER be picked on because he is just too cute and funny; my son will NEVER need...

Read More

No One Told Me My Toddler Would Hate Me

It has been three weeks since we welcomed our second bundle of joy into our home. It is amazing that despite all of the fears of not being able to love another child, that you really just do. Everyone told me that I would. I was seriously scared that I would not. I talked to many moms of multiple children about it to assure myself that they do and that I would. And I do. I can honestly say that today however, it is definitely a little bit different from the love I feel for our first son. Not in a good way, or a bad way, or even a way I would expect other people to understand. It just feels different. But I do think that I know why. Everyone always asked me if I thought he was prepared to be a big brother, and my answer almost always was no. We talked to him about the baby. We read books with him about being a big brother. We talked to him about breastfeeding, and that mommy’s boobies were going to feed the baby milk. We constantly talked to him about mommy’s belly, and had him touch it and give it kisses. We talked to him about helping with the new baby. We even told him the baby’s name, which we barely told anyone else. Despite all of...

Read More

Vaginal Birth vs. C-Section: Which one is the “real” deal?

So we all know that there are really two options when giving birth, right?? We either do it the “natural” way, which is vaginal, or we have a c-section. Simple. Two options. Some women have the choice of which option they want to go with, some don’t. Some want the “all-natural” experience, without the assistance of medication. Some want an epidural the second they feel a single contraction. Some want a c-section, because it maybe takes the guessing out of how painful childbirth can really be, or they have already had that experience with a previous pregnancy.  And you know what, sometimes there is just no choice in the matter, and we have to trust that the healthcare professionals are helping us make the right decision for ourselves and the baby. Seems simple. So why are women made to feel that one option is more courageous and brave than another?? I was due with my first son at the end of April 2013. My husband and I “prepared” ourselves for childbirth. We attended a birthing class. Some women think the classes are a waste, but I left birthing class feeling like a ROCKSTAR! I CAN do this. I can push this baby out of my vag, no matter how painful it is going to be. I got this, I got this, I got this I kept telling myself. I...

Read More

Subscribe to get our posts via email:

Hugs from Us to You

All rights reserved. All blog posts, images and related content are property of CT Working Moms, LLC. Republication or redistribution of content, text or images, in part or whole is strictly prohibited without prior consent from the website owner.