Confess It!

Confession-template

As busy working moms, we tend to feel guilty about a LOT that goes on in our lives. Here at CT Working Moms, we think that if we are all a little more honest about how things really are, we’ll all feel more empowered and less isolated. Take a second to send in your confession(s) and it may appear right here! Please note that your confession will not appear automatically because we screen them before putting them up. (We will post all confessions anonymously)

If you’re interested, our CTWM’s bloggers did their own True Confessions series. Click to read through their posts.

 

 

Real Reader-Submitted Confessions (updated frequently so check back!)

My daughter is now 21 months and I just now feel “true love/Can’t live without her” emotions. I love that I love her now but I feel guilty for not feeling that way before. Having an infant was hard.

I feel guilty about soooooo many things…. I got divorced when my daughter was 3, and at times I feel she watched way too much television because I was upset. Now she’s seven. She has the occasional temper tantrum or attitude and I just yell or get snippy. The positive side, she does great in school and likes to play with her friends. Mommy guilt is by far the worst and every day you pray for the best!

Monday is my favorite day of the week because I get to go to work and sit down for more than 6 seconds.

Sometimes I hate my friends who act like parenting is easy.

I miss having friends. I’ve lost all my single, kid-free friends and I seem to be pathologically incapable of making “mommy friends” no matter how many playdates I’ve arranged. My daughter is 3.5 and I feel like I’ve spent that entire time alone (even though I’m married!)

I hate the fact that if I’m struggling with a cranky toddler for several minutes, my husband gets fed up in another room, comes in and threatens her (with a spanking, toy removal, etc.) then leaves immediately. It’s not the threats that bother me so much, it’s the fact that I feel like he doesn’t trust me to resolved the situation myself. And this happens nearly every day!

I don’t let people come into my house because it is such a mess. I don’t remember a time when I actually had it clean. But I have two jobs and two kids and I lack the ambition to just forget everything else and get it done.

I don’t want to be defined as a mother and a wife. I love being both, but I feel like my worthiness now relies on how well I take care of other people and not on who I am as my own person. As my silent protest, I refuse to take myself out of my FB profile photo. It’s my page, I will not replace myself with a picture of my son…despite how adorable he may be.

I was recently told by doctors that it will be very unlikely that I can have children naturally, most likely due to stress. I completed a tough graduate curriculum at the top of my class, and I feel like I’m getting punished by the universe for being a work-a-holic and wanting kids. Men can have both, why can’t I?

I tell my 2 and 6-year-old to “shut up”. I’ve gotten tired of saying “be quiet” and now can’t control “shut up”. I feel horrible.

I miss alone time…

I spend all my time with my son, I hate leaving him with anyone but my mom or husband.

I’m jealous of my sister-in-law who quit working the moment she got pregnant and hasn’t had to lift a finger since.

My mother-in-law tortures me and my husband and wants to ignore all the little boundaries we’ve set for the health of our family.

I worry and feel guilty that I wont be able to give our cat as much time as we do now once baby arrives.

I have stayed home with my children for two years and I decided to go back to work. We don’t need the money, I just want to go back.

I secretly want to stop breast-feeding so I can work out in the morning without feeling so engorged.

I am tired, stressed, and resentful.

I say ‘shh’ to my daughter WAY too much…even when she’s just making regular noise/sounds. The more stressed out I am the more raw I feel & it’s like the sound vibrations actually hurt.

My house is always a mess! I spend hours and days cleaning and it never ends. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I wanted to be a mom, not a cleaning lady! My daughter is the best little but her creativity gets everywhere. I love it but the mess is so frustrating. I never cared before, but I want her to live in a beautiful home. Yet I don’t even know if she even cares. I don’t want her to look back at her childhood and think, my house was a mess.

I feel really guilty because I hate breastfeeding and I get so much pressure to continue.

I am a busy working mother of two little girls. I feel so overwhelmed sometimes with how much I have to do everyday. I say I love my job but secretly I wish my husband made enough money so I could stay at home. I always imagined staying at home and it’s sad that dream will never come true. Also I still let me 11 month old sleep in our room in her pack and play. I tell everyone that she sleeps in her crib just so they won’t judge me. I just miss her during the day and want to feel close to her at night even if we are sleeping. Is that strange?

My libido has been really low since my son was born. Sometimes I wait until my husband is asleep in bed before I go to bed just to avoid having sex.

I’m mad at myself for not being able to afford to move. Houses are only slightly out of reach and we’ve totally outgrown our space. Had I been working instead of staying home, we’d probably be able to have moved by now. Even worse? I’m about ready to re-enter the workforce and still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up.

I’m grateful my husband works from home, I don’t think I could have survived these first few months of motherhood without him.

I think I’ve gotten this mom thing down, but I can’t figure out how to be anything else. I’ll go back to work when my son is 9 months old (I have mixed feelings about that) and I’m just not sure how to do it.

I adore my son. I resent my husband for never making me feel special, for constantly sitting in front of the tv, for taking two-hour naps once he gets home and then wakes up just in time to go back to sleep for the night, for not taking care of me when my back went out, for not making enough money to allow me to stay home with my son, for saying he doesn’t want a second child, then two years later when I’ve come to terms with it, for saying he does and then when I bring it up he doesn’t show interest. I secretly relish the fact that our TV burnt out.

I used to be a stay at home mom, and my husband would always say things like “This is my house”, or “I pay these bill, and you can get out”. I really hated that so I started making plans to go back to work so that I can bring in my own money, that way he can never say those things again. Even though he has since apologized. Now he is sort of sad because I have become somewhat independent. But I enjoy the independence. I just wish I was with the children instead of my husband or the babysitter because I do a better job taking care of my babies than the both of them. I also enjoy the fact that I bring in my own money, and I don’t have to ask or beg him for money anymore.

For 3 years I did in vitro fertilization. Whoever said it was “fun” to practice to make babies either is super human or lying. It is stressful and hard. I finally got pregnant with twins via science, 6 months later – I asked for divorce. So much focus on baby making, I didn’t see he wasn’t right for me all along. I was so scared to ask for a divorce, what would people think since the babies were so young and we tried for so long? I was pleasantly surprised that everyone fully supported me. IVF is stressful, Twins are stressful – do I promote divorce? NO! But it is OK if that is what you decide… people will understand

I am so jealous of my husband – he works out of town and pretty much does what he wants, while I stay home to deal with our 1-year-old, cook and clean.

My husband is sooo clingy it makes me want to puke! I wish he would just let me have space! And he wonders why we never have sex!

I hate that my daughter’s father doesn’t bust his butt more for our family – but he claims he is working as hard as he can, when I know this not to be true. I sometimes feel like a single mom.

I hate the way my husband ignores our 2-year-old son. He always seems annoyed and uninterested in him. I thought he would be such an involved father and now that he isn’t I hate him for it. I want him out!

Tonight, I hid on another room and ate a brownie because I didn’t want to share with my 2-year-old and there was only one. In my defense, I’ll be 9 months pregnant tomorrow!

I HATE being a working mother. I want to clean my house and take care of my kids!!

I’m losing steam trying to do and have it all. I feel like a failure at my job. I am just going through the motions of life. I really hope I reach another plateau soon, I think I felt this when my first child turned 7 months. The feeling that physically I can’t do any more.

I wish I didn’t have to work 40 plus hours to support my family, and then hear from my husband how stressful his 4 hours have been taking care of our child.

When my daughter was three, she asked me if the witch in Sleeping Beauty was evil. “No, baby. She just hasn’t had her coffee yet.” Later that afternoon, my daughter asked me, “Mommy, did you have coffee?” Nailed.

Maternity leave was very very very very isolating.

I feel like it’s unacceptable for my house to be a mess. I wish I could buy into the whole, “I’m a relaxed mom and my house is a mess” thing.

I’m having a hard time going back to work. I feel really guilty leaving my baby (1 year old) and hate that I will miss so much! And yet, going back was my decision because I’ve worked so hard for my career. It’s so hard!

My greatest accomplishments as a mom can never be told. Today I nursed my baby while giving my 3-year-old a temporary tattoo. While pooping. (Me, not my children.)

My 3 year old daughter is my best friend. I’d rather be with her than do anything else. There, I said it.

I have three boys and I want a girl desperately. We are done having kids though as I could not handle the possibility of having a 4th boy!

Sometimes, I’m jealous of my divorced friends who get more “me” time when their exes have the kids for a few days.

I would love for my husband to find a sister-wife for me. Can you imagine how easy life would be if there was always someone at home to take care of the kids, house, and errands while we both concentrated on work?

My husband is a nurse and works three 12 hour shifts per week. I am jealous that he gets time off during the week and he gets to spend that time by himself without the kids because they are in daycare. It really pisses me off that he barely gets anything done around the house on those days off. Meanwhile I work Monday through Friday 40 hours a week and still do most of the chores. Not to mention he works every other weekend and that leaves me with the kids by myself after a long week at work. I wish that he would spend more time with the kids when he has days off.

I’ve been waiting for a beautiful weather day that I have no appointments at work so that I could play hooky and take my son to the beach for the day. Tomorrow is supposed to be beautiful and I have no appointments — and I’m sitting here questioning whether or not I can actually go. Literally struggling…crying…why is this so hard?! I’m the boss…why is this so hard?! I want to spend one last beautiful day of the summer with my little guy before he starts school (first day ever next week!) and I’m questioning it. Why?!?!

I can’t stand my mother in law! She is the sweetest person ever, always wanting to take care of everything and everybody, but I just want her to leave me alone!

I resent the fact that because I work 12 hour night shifts, I’m still responsible for the kids and the house during the day, while my husband takes over after everyone’s asleep and everything is done. I’m exhausted.

I wish my husband could get along with people so we could have friends with kids.

I’m jealous of women my age I see that are single and don’t have kids

I am glad my daughter gets her intelligence from me, not her father

I have a 12 and 9-year-old I gave up for adoption because I could raise them the way they deserved to be raised but I feel really guilty that I have had a child 8 years later that I am going to be able to keep and raise myself.

My toddler is turning 2 this month and I don’t think I’ll be ready for another until she’s 4 or 5. I do want to give her a sibling but feel like I’ll be tied down once I’m a mother of 2.

I’ve submitted more than one entry on this confession page because I don’t want to say these things to my friends who have kids, they think I have it all together and I don’t want them to think any different.

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by the crushing responsibility of my life–raising kids, maintaining a job, trying to create a social network and community for our kids, trying to spend time with my husband. Some days I feel like I’m drowning.

I hate it when my in-laws tell me how to be a mom. They think they’re being helpful but really they just make me dislike them a little more every time they do it. I can’t wait to move just to get away from them!

I loved being pregnant! I loved the attention I got while pregnant too. I can’t wait to be pregnant again for so many reasons, one of them being that I can’t wait to stop sucking in my stomach again.

I seriously dislike my mother in law. My baby is at the age where she doesn’t like strangers, and I like that she cried when my mother in law talks to her or holds her. I also don’t trust her AT ALL and have no intention of ever letting her babysit my daughter, but I tell my husband that she will eventually. Yeah, never gonna happen.

I resent my husband for not getting a job. I want to stay home with our baby and I feel like I would do a better job at taking care of her and the house then he does. Because of this, I take long naps and act asleep in the middle of the night when the baby needs to be fed or changed.

I hate that my daughter’s dad is no help at all, pretty much I am almost a single mom!

I’m a teacher and will be home with my one year old for the entire summer. I’m dreading it more than I can possibly describe.

I let my 12-year-old son stay up WAY too late because it’s too exhausting and contentious to try to make him go to bed any earlier.

The only thing I look forward to most days is going to sleep.

I feel guilty for not pursuing a career with my degree because all I really wanted to do was be a mom. I am happy with my choice, but I feel bad that my husband has to support our family on his own.

Most days I don’t enjoy nursing. I only do it because I know it’s a benefit for my son.

I look forward to going to work every day so I don’t have to worry about my crying 4 month old or ill-mannered step daughter or needy husband in the evenings!

I focused so much time taking care of my daughter that I forgot to take care of myself.

My husband and I are BOTH Master’s degree holders working full-time, and yet we are now living with my parents having just gone through foreclosure. Ironically, we waiting years to start our family to be on better financial footing, and completely lost our footing when I was about 6 months pregnant! We are adjusting and moving forward, but I wish we could raise our daughter away from my parents (and their constant judgement).

I bring my kids to work. I know I should feel “blessed”, but I can’t get ANYTHING done.

Sometimes I have an uncontrollable urge to scream at my husband.

I couldn’t breastfeed for medical reasons, and I’m secretly SO happy about formula feeding. It makes sharing the feedings much easier.

I love adorning my 7-month old with a little bow on the top of her head. I know she will look at pictures when she’s older & hate me, but it makes me giddy with the cuteness of it!

My husband doesn’t understand that for Mother’s Day all I want is to be left alone!

I am so happy I found this webpage, read it, and realize how much I am NOT alone!!

I am a single mother who doesn’t have time to date and I don’t feel special, I only feel invisible.

I can’t wait until my kids move out!

Sometimes I wish I were a single mom so I could raise my son and discipline him on my terms. I already do 95% of the parenting anyways.

I’m still breastfeeding (16 months) and I love it, but my family not so much. I tell everyone we’ll wean soon (including husband) but I have no intention of it.

I let my son watch too much TV.

I have a dark chocolate bar stashed in my purse that I sneak a piece of after dinner while I’m “doing the dishes” and my husband plays with our kid.

I am disappointed that I did not marry someone who makes enough money to support our family on his own. I do enjoy working, but I wish it was really a choice.

My spouse has no idea how much I put on the TV for the kids.

I got a job so I wouldn’t have to stay home anymore. I feel guilty that I don’t want to stay home, but I love working.

Breastfeeding didn’t work out for us, and I was ultimately happy about that. Formula feeding was a heckuva lot easier than pumping 24/7.

I am so excited that my son gets to go to school, it’s my TIME now! FREE!!!

I will soon take a vacation day when my son has school and my husband is at work. A long walk and a chick flick at the movie theatre are planned.

My 2-year-old loves to read and will ask to read to first thing in the morning if he sees the books still out. I have started hiding the books in the morning so he will just leave me alone for a little while and let me drink my coffee.

I sometimes pretend to be doing chores in our bedroom (like cleaning the bathroom), so I can lie down for 15 minutes.

I love instigating silly time fun with my son and then having my husband deal with the settle down transition while I go relax…

I’m pregnant and while I couldn’t be happier; I’m also extremely frustrated at how quickly my body and moods are changing and my husband is completely unaffected. ESPECIALLY on the nights I’m too tired to do anything but fall into bed at 7pm and he goes out with friends. My life instantly changed the minute the test said positive while his seems to have not changed at all.

My 3-year-old son found my vibrator…and started using it as a microphone. I was mortified!

Sometimes, when I am driving away from my son’s daycare in the morning, I feel like screaming, “FREE AT LAST!!”

Now that I am married and we are done having kids, I feel like there’s no special events to look forward to in my life anymore.

We have a 9 month and a 28 month old. My husband gets to go to grad school and I am jealous when he complains about the work. That was supposed to me!!

I’m 40 and the mother of three. I adore them, but I want to be a woman, not only a mother.

My house is a mess, clothes and toys are everywhere, I can’t contain it. I need help to get my house in order. I am so depressed over it but I’m too ashamed to ask anyone for help. It’s sucking the life out of me and makes me feel like a complete failure.

My family doesn’t know I broke our doorbell on purpose because I don’t feel like entertaining guests who happen to pop over. Namely my mother in law who I ignored when she came to the door, I waited inside quietly until she finally left. She hates me anyway.

When my daughter was born I was amazed how she didn’t have that “newborn look.” Years later I look at her newborn pics and realize she was the strangest looking newborn I’ve ever seen.

I gave up my beloved, very well paid non-profit job for a new job for my husband in a new little town. I thought it would make him happy. Two years later, he is fulfilled but I am unemployed and miserable. Why would I choose someone else’s happiness over mine?

Sometimes my kids eat macaroni and cheese for dinner several nights in a row because I’m too tired to make anything else.

I’m too scared to have kids because I think it would ruin my relationship.

12 years ago I put my son up for adoption and to this day I have mixed feelings on that decision. It was the greatest and worst decision I’ve ever made.

I get the most impatient at my kid when my dealing with my husbands constant level of need. The kid sometimes feels like the easy part of life.

I haven’t been allowed to sleep in for over 23 months. My husband and I both work from home and I STILL am the one to get up with our son every morning before the sun is up. I am pregnant right now and so tired I can barely stay awake during the day- but you better believe I won’t ever get a morning off while the husband sleeps in for 2+ hours.

Sometimes I feel too burnt out to play with my kids…I say “in a little while” too much. Which ends up being never!!

I hate that asking my husband to pick up our son from daycare is like arranging a babysitter. Um, HELLO?!?! Last time I checked this child was half your responsibility!!

My kids eat vegetables maybe twice a week.

I completely forgot my son lost his tooth and the Tooth Fairy didn’t show up for two days…

My friends wonder how I lost the baby weight. The fact is that every time I go to sit down to eat, one of my three kids falls from a chair, requests something, starts fighting, spills their drink or is having some form of a mental breakdown. I wish I could enjoy just one meal. Maybe if I just start serving it on the floor like you do for animals…

I miss my life before becoming a mother and want that freedom back.

I think my daughter is not very smart.

I’m only pretending when I say I want to meet and marry a great guy. Honestly, the freedom of being a single mom is great. And when I broke up with my last boyfriend, those were crocodile tears I shed.

I’m thrilled for the Atlanta ocean – it gives me just the right amount of space between me and my in-laws!

I sometimes sing Taylor Swift’s song “Trouble” to my boys….”I knew you were trouble when you walked in…”

The clutter inside my house (mostly toys and kids stuff) overwhelms me and makes me depressed. There’s so much of it and no place to put it, and I don’t even know where to begin….so I don’t. I need help. I just want a clean house. I feel if I cleaned all day every day for a week it still wouldn’t be clean enough.

I have had a low sex drive for years but after 2 kids it’s really taken a dive. My husband resents me for it and is in a perpetual state of low-grade anger. He jokes about it, but there’s underlying resentment behind it, which makes me want to have sex even less. I feel so alone, and frustrated.

My husband was raised very religiously. He thinks I believe but I’m slowly loosing my faith. I’m afraid it will affect our marriage if we don’t have the same faith.

When my daughter was born, I had vivid dreams of me killing her, and I enjoyed it. It haunts me now, 8 months later, that my mind did that.

My husband snores and I have insomnia. Then he gets mad when I sleep on the couch. Wish he would get his own room. I don’t think I’d miss him much.

I leave my kids at daycare for 2 hours after I get off work.

Sometimes I wish things were as simple as they seemed to be in the 1950s. Dad went to work, Mom stayed home with the kids. No agonizing over balancing work/life.

My ex-husband and I have joint custody of our 5-year-old daughter. Sometimes, when she’s had a few sassy days with me, I secretly look forward to the day she goes to Daddy’s. I feel so guilty because I feel like I should appreciate the time I have with her. But man… sometimes those hard days are SO HARD I just need a break.

I yell at my husband and daughter way too often.

I HATED being pregnant and could not WAIT for it to be over. Now I know it was worth every moment of pain and suffering.

After Newtown: If I didn’t have to work this last week, I would have been staked out in front of my kid’s school each day, just to make sure she was safe. I feel guilty that I am not there to keep her safe. A week ago, I was normal. Now I am crazy overprotective and I hate the world for making me this way.

I constantly compare my sons’ behavior to my side of the family and my husband’s side, and prefer it when they act more like members of my side.

I wish I never had kids.

Sometimes my son sleeps in his clothes instead of pjs.

I still feel bad for what I did a decade ago (before I had kids of my own). As I sat down during a flight the kid behind me kept kicking my chair. I turned around and suggested his mom consider moving (including the baby on her lap) to some empty chairs in the back of the plane. Of course that I pay for that now because when I fly with my own kids they cry non-stop, throw up on people etc.

I sit in the car for a while just to have some peace and quiet from the demands of life.

I resent the male executives on my team who have stay-at-home wives. They cannot understand why I want to go home at the end of the day instead of working through the night since they have wives to do all the parent work for them.

I wish my wife was the same woman I married before kids.

I love staying home with my son and cherish spending time together but I hate playing with him. I just can’t work up the energy to get excited about building the same block tower over and over again. So most of the time I read a book while he plays by himself and I feel like the most useless mother ever.

I could not be more unhappy working part-time. I miss the old me who worked a lot but knew who she was and was proud of her income. I don’t know this new, dependent wife.

I don’t love my job anymore, but I don’t think I could be a good stay-at-home mom.

My 3-year old loves coffee, especially Starbucks.

I drive with the music off when I am alone in the car so I can hear what silence is like.

I gained 10 lbs with my second baby (from 120-130 lbs) and as soon as had the baby, I lost the 10 lbs and everybody hates me for it!

I’m on active duty in the military and we are stationed across the country from my mother in law. I’m so thankful because when she found out I was pregnant (we were not married at the time) she wanted to take the baby and raise it with her for two years until I get discharged from the military. Helllloooo!!! I’m the mother not you!!! She’s crazy and I’m secretly glad we don’t live near her. My husband does not know how I feel about her.

I love my daughter more than I love my husband and could never live without her but could live without him.

I love my 16-year-old son, but I have never enjoyed being a mother.

I love my 10-year-old and we have great times. She is bright and funny and kind but I really really reallllly miss my baby. I used to think that I couldn’t wait until she got older so I didn’t have to do everything for her. Now I wish she was 6 months old again so she needs me more.

I’ve been in a low-grade panic for over a year when the realization hit me that if someone is going to mess up our marriage, it will probably be me.

I hate that I work 12 hour days and still have to come home to an uncooked dinner, unwashed laundry, unbathed kids, and unfinished homework. And on top of that when payday comes around the husband spends all the money and bills aren’t always paid. I have yet to figure out how to help him see his financial frivolity is hurting the family. I hate that I think he just doesn’t care about us like he should.

Just once I would like to be totally irresponsible, and just spend all of my money on me and not take care of anyone else.

My 15 yr old son acts like his father, selfish and moody. I fear that I may hate him too.

I love my children, but I think the stress of them killed my marriage.

Some days I invent errands to get away from my stepkids, and when I really get down about the infertility misery my husband and I are going through, I can’t stand to be in the same room with them.

My four-year old is a brat! A cute brat mind you, but I have a hard time dealing with him. Most of my time with him is yelling or punishments. I wish he would outgrow this phase.

I make my daughter keep her room clean, while mine goes to hell. Because I don’t want her to live like I do.

It has been almost a year since my husband and I had sex, and I have absolutely zero interest in doing so any time soon.

Sometimes I go months without a haircut, just because I have no time to go!

I have officially reached the weight I was on the day before my second child was born.

Yesterday I was wishing for some quiet time and said to myself, “I hope the kids disappear.” Then I heard about what happened in Newtown and I felt like the worst mother in the world.

Glad to see there are still real looking women with real bodies out there instead of those implanted/botox fakes.

Sometimes I pretend I need to use the bathroom just so the kids leave me alone. I sit on the floor and play Bejewled, Subway Surfer, or Angry Birds on my phone. :)

Sometimes after work, I see a bus at union station going to another state. I fantasize that I get on that bus and just disappear for a few days – all by myself!

I’m so angry that my husband doesn’t clean the house when I make twice as much money and do ten times more than he does.

I worked and supported my family of 2 kids while my husband stayed home to take care of them. I hated it and resented him for not taking care of me and allowing me to be home with my kids. Fast forward 5 years and I’m home now with my kids and they are driving me insane, I almost want to go back to work. But the worst part is, I blame him for their behavior!!! If I had raised them my way, I don’t think they’d act the way they do.

I love my boys but I wish I had more me time.

I am thankful and very blessed that my husband can support us and 2 kids and 3 dogs with his job. Because I am a stay at home mom,  I feel like a complete burden to him because I can’t contribute financially. He pays for all my medical bills and my old student loans and my insulin (not cheap).  I wish I could do more, but daycare costs too much for me to go back to work.

My husband works hard, but I feel he should work harder. I HATE it that I have to work full-time to provide for our family and that I miss out on so much with our baby boy. He’s always “tired”. Yah, buddy, I’m tired too, but after working all day, I still have to cook for everyone, clean up and get the kids ready for bed. If the TV’s not on, he’s asleep. Why won’t he HELP!?

I feel like a failure as a mom because my son has multiple allergies and so I don’t make him cry-it-out (CIO) when he wakes in the night….he’s 16 months….

My youngest was just diagnosed with ADHD and I feel like I have failed him as a mom.

I hate that my husband acts like it’s not fair for him to stay home and take care of our sick baby when I make more money than he does.

I am pregnant with my 2nd girl and instead of being overjoyed I’m scared that my 1st girl will feel less loved, then i worry that I will be over compensating for the first one and missing out on the 2nd one. So when I say I’M SO EXCITED” I’m actually thinking “IM DREADING THE FIRST WEEK!”

Sometimes when my baby cries at night I pretend I’m sleeping while my husband gets up.

My maternity leave is almost over and I go back to work in a week. I am feeling so depressed to leave my 3 month old and 18 month old and feeling angry that my husband doesn’t earn more money or get benefits and that I am the one who supports our family. I really don’t want to go back to work.

I never thought I would have a master’s degree and find myself in foreclosure and filing for bankruptcy. My babies are my sanity right now.

I’m worried that I may have a favorite child.

Before we had kids, I anticipated that my spouse would be a fantastic parent. I’ve been sorely disappointed.

I worry about liking one of my twins more than the other and feel guilty when I think one is being better than the other one. Then I wonder what it would be like to just have one baby and I feel guilty all over again.

Why do I always have to be the adult in my family? I find it totally exhausting and unfair.

I hate that we don’t have a house in a kid friendly neighborhood; I feel like my kids are missing out on all the wonderfulness of an outgoing neighborhood. Reading posts about great neighbors, and kids having a best friend just down the street make me feel like I’m not being the best mom to my kids because I cannot afford the rent of a home in a good neighborhood, and can’t afford to sell our condo. The worst part is with my oldest being 9 now I feel like even if we can move there in a few yrs, she’ll never have gotten that chance in her childhood.

Raising a son in high school is the HARDEST thing I have ever done.  He’s a good kid but I feel like I’m in a for a rough 4 years and then he will leave and go to college and I will miss him terribly.

I can see why my baby LOVEs breast milk, formula tastes AWFUL!  Yeah, I’ve tried both.

I hate being a single mom. I often wonder how far in life I’d be if I didn’t get pregnant. I hate that my son isn’t quite 8 months old yet and doesn’t want to breastfeed anymore. After trying these past two nights to let him cry and keep trying every 5 minutes for 30-45 minutes then giving up and giving him formula in a bottle makes me cry.

I get filled with anger when my husband complains about not having matching socks; do your own laundry then.

I really wish I wouldn’t be so hard on my 13 yr old son. Because really he is an amazing kid, with a huge heart, smart, athletic, etc. But being a single mom by the time I get home from a 10 hour work day, I am so cranky and sometimes snap at him for little things. I wish I could stop it.

I am a great mother. I am a terrible wife.

My husband and I ( both in the social work field) always said after we had a couple of kids of our own we’d like to adopt a child from a social services agency to share our love and family with. Now that we have 2 ‘biological ‘kids, I still want to adopt that 3rd one but am afraid that his or her mental health issues will negatively affect the 2 other kids. I feel like I’m being a snob and have become a ‘sell out’.

I tell my husband I want a second baby, but in actual truth, I don’t have the energy or the will power to go through more sleepless nights, peeing only when baby is asleep and breastfeeding every 2 hours.

I think I secretly hate my husband for not making more money which causes me to work and support the family.

Most times, when I can’t find a tissue, I’ll just eat my own boogers. If I ever caught my 3 or 4-year-old doing this, I would act totally disgusted.

I had no idea parenting was going to be so hard, or so messy.

I’m so tired of just getting by and others (like my brother & sister-in-law married without kids) talking about all the trips they go on and all the gadgets they buy…or are going to buy. All I “get” to buy are diapers and worry about getting food on the table. Sometimes I want to yell that in their faces. Is that bad?

I can’t wait for baby #2 to be born and done nursing so that I can have my body back to myself and enjoy a margarita or a glass of wine at the end of the day.

My baby rolled off the couch when she was two months old. I went into the kitchen real quick to heat up a burrito in the microwave – I was starving!!! Anyway, I heard a thud and the baby started crying. She was ok, but I felt like the worst mother ever.

Marriage before kids was easy breezy. A good marriage now, after 10 yrs and with 2 kids is the hardest thing I have ever tackled. Right now it’s not going well, but I have faith.

Sometimes I am so tired, physically and mentally drained that when the baby wakes in the middle of the night and my husband doesn’t even flinch to get up – I feel more alone than I ever had in my life. I wish I could tell him.

Sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision becoming a mom. I absolutely love my girls and would do anything in the world for them, but sometimes I feel that I just am not handling their needs the right way. I am over stressed and over worked and sometimes I take it out on my family and it isn’t fair to them. I just want to make sure my kids grow up happy and healthy and well-adjusted and sometimes I feel that it won’t happen because I am not doing a good enough job as their mother. Everyone tells me I am a great mom, but I don’t see it a lot of the time.

All of the Moms in my neighborhood are SAHM (stay-at-home moms)… and it makes me feel like a horrible mother… especially because I’m a special ed teacher and I take care of other people’s kids all day.

I don’t want my child to be spoiled or feel entitled, but I have a hard time saying no and, frankly, as an only child, I want her to have everything and it’s not like I have other kids that I need to “share the wealth” with. I try to convince myself that the selfish, entitled attitude is something that is taught and learned, and that I can still give my child everything without them feeling this way, but I’m not convinced.

My 3-year-old son is my best friend. I’d rather hang out with him than my partner (of 7 years) or my girlfriends.

Sometime’s I just NEVER know if I am doing the right things & sometime’s I just wanna scream!

Since I’m single, I have gotten in to the habit of letting my daughter sleep in my bed most nights. I complain that she won’t sleep in her own bed, but in reality, I sleep much better with her next to me.

I feel like my mother “pimps” out my weight loss after having my babies. She tells everyone that I’ve lost so much weight and then proceeds to “pinch” the areas I need to work on.

I was training for my first triathlon when I found out I was pregnant with #2… I never got to compete and I always wonder “What If”?

I think my marriage was better before the baby.

I love my son & wouldn’t trade him for the world – BUT I do miss having ME time & freedom to do what I want.

I went away for a week without my husband and 5-year-old. It was one of the best weeks in recent memory. I feel horrible that I didn’t even miss them.

Sometimes I wish I could be a little more carefree and be happy by living in the moment.

It breaks my heart that I have to work to support our family when I could be with my beautiful son all day and tending to his development. I wish more than anything that my husband would take it upon himself to get a better paying job or an extra job to make this happen.

I love my boys even though now I see it might limit my career aspirations. Amazingly enough, I really don’t care about that anymore.

I love my family but sometimes I just need some me time.

I drink beer Saturday nights after I put baby down to sleep.

I love all of my children, I would die for them in a heartbeat….but I don’t like my one son much at all. I love him, I just don’t like him. And I HATE that I feel that way…hate hate hate. I pray that it changes.

I let my daughter watch dvr’d sesame street when i need 20 minutes to get something done after work.

I hate that my husband thinks because he works 8 hours that he does not have to help around the house nor with the children. I also hate that his mother condones this behavior and thinks he should be waited on hand and foot!

I love my husband but secretly wish we could have one more wife in our family. Then I could focus more on my kids and my job and wouldn’t keep messing up with both because she’d be there to fill in the blanks and smooth the rough edges.

After having my babies, I used erotic romance books to reclaim my desire to make love again!

I don’t trust anyone with my 6 month old daughter. Not even my baby’s fathers side of the family.

My daughter and I sing together already at 3 months and she won’t with anyone else – I love it not sharing with anyone

I really hate to admit it but I only breastfeed to keep my boobs perky. I am not looking forward to when I stop and they become saggy

Every time we travel, my son is terrible. I swear my family thinks I have a spoiled monster on my hands. How many times can I say, “He’s not like this at home., I swear!”

I don’t know what to do with myself now that my “baby” is going off to college in the fall.

I miss being free to get up and go wherever I wanted whenever I wanted!

I get my 3-year-old something every time we go shopping

I feel guilty if I’m not constantly doing something productive

Sometimes I ask the kids for five minutes of complete silence after they have worn me out with their “mom she/he did…”

I’m beginning to resent my husband.

I have 16 and 12-year-old girls and sometimes I want to tear my hair trying to figure out how to deal with the changing emotions and moods. It’s as exhausting as when they were babies only harder.

I let my kid have ice cream for breakfast sometimes because I just don’t feel like dealing with the whining.

I love my kids but wonder sometimes why I did this. Sometimes I don’t like being a mom.

I was not in a hurry for my second kid to say “Mama.” Now he says it, and it is very sweet, but on Monday morning I love going to a place where no one follows me around saying “Mama!”

I feel sad going through a divorce with my baby being four months.

I get really angry when I feel like I’m doing everything at home plus work full-time.

I would really LOVE a personal assistant, especially at 6am to take my baby downstairs.

Lately I feel like I have been stuffing my face with everything under the sun.  I know how to eat healthy but preparing healthy meals feels very daunting for me.

My husband is in the best shape of his life right now, he goes to the gym four times a week while I let myself go again.  I need to get my butt motivated and get to the gym myself.  I always wanted to do the PX90 or the Insanity video, but I know it’s a waste of money because I will never do it.

I had a whole weekend of thinking about all the fun things I can’t do with 2 young kids. I have lots of friends who aren’t parents, and at times, I’m really envious of them (and at times not, of course, too). This was one of those weekends.

Last night I was hanging out with good friends and they were going to walk into town to our cute local frozen yogurt place and I wanted to go with them, but the baby needed to go home to have dinner and go to bed so I couldn’t go. And I REALLY wanted to go, I wanted to go more with them than home with the baby. It was one of those moments where you really feel how becoming a parent has changed pretty much every aspect of your life.

I’m really worried about passing down body image issues to my daughter. That is the absolute LAST thing I want to do.

My baby has hit the stage where she whines and screams when she doesn’t get what she wants. I hate it and find it incredibly annoying.

I absolutely ADORE my three sons and wouldn’t trade them for the world…but I’d still really love a daughter some day.

Life was a lot easier before Kai began to crawl. I’ve adjusted, but I still miss the bliss of having an easy-to-manage babe. A LOT.

My boys make up jokes all the time and tell them to me one after the other and I can’t even pretend they’re funny. It’s like torture to me and I always ask them to stop.

I enjoy my job and spending time with my son.  After taking a week off because schools were closed for the week, I was happy to return to the office.

I can’t stand my mother in law. Although she might not be as bad as my own mother, I still can’t stand her. I feel like she wants to take my glory as a mother by telling me what to do!

I missed my little guy when I went on my business trip but man did I love sleeping through the night!

My four-year old son sleeps in my bed with me, I secretly love it but am too embarrassed to tell anyone!

I HATE that my husband is in better shape than I am and has better eating habits!!

I constantly daydream about checking into a hotel room (without husband or baby) for an entire weekend…

I still mourn my pre-baby life.

Sometimes I am a grumpy mom.

I have 2 kids 6 years apart… I constantly feel guilty that I can’t give my older child 100% attention anymore…

I hate my messy, cluttered house, but not as much as I hate cleaning it.

I don’t want my kids to grow up, I wish I could stop time and keep them little.

Sometimes I don’t feel mature enough to be a mother.

I have two kids, I never breastfed, and I really don’t feel guilty.

My kids behave terribly in public 9 times out of 10.

I hate nursing but feel too guilty to give it up and switch to formula feeding.

Because of the traumatic birth I had, I’m afraid of having another child for fear of the same thing happening.

I let my kid watch TV so I can do things I need to do. Something I always said I’d never do before I actually had my own kids.

I hate my post-birth body. I wish I didn’t.

My daily routine leaves me exhausted and I can’t figure out how to work out.

My husband and I argue more than I am comfortable with.

Sometimes  I stay later at work so I can have more baby-free time. I hate to admit that.

I think my daycare provider is secretly judging the way I parent (sometimes not so secretly).

Once I accidentally drove my newborn home without strapping her into her car seat. My mother-in-law was babysitting and when I went to pick her up, she was asleep in her carrier with a blanket over her. I didn’t realize she wasn’t strapped into the carrier until I got her all the way home. Thank god nothing happened and now I always triple check!

As I type this I am letting my baby cry it out. I can’t handle it right now.

I don’t think I’ll ever fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes again.

I LIKE McDonald’s!!! We eat there every time we go on a road trip and I REALLY look forward to it!

I LIKE how my baby stinks!!! While they’re still exclusively breastfed, I think baby poo smells almost sweet…and well, yup, I LIKE IT!!

I LIKE picking at my baby ~ his ears, his eye-goop, his boogers, and his cradle cap.

The first 2 months after giving birth I didn’t find much about motherhood I liked. Now of course, there’s a ton I love but I admit at first, I really struggled.

I had a mental health crisis after the birth of my baby. The birth was so traumatic that once I left the hospital I had uncontrollable anxiety and had to rely on good friends and close family to help me get through it.

I love that we formula feed. I never thought I would say that, I was all about the breastfeeding, but I love that my husband can contribute equally because breastfeeding didn’t work out for me.

I will let my kids go out without brushing their teeth some days if we have to get out the door and they are being psyco-pants about it.

I’ll put my daughter in clothes that don’t really match and if anybody says anything say that she picked them out (which she does more days than not…)

I really hate to clean the house and pretty much only do it when company is coming over or before my husband gets home from a work trip so he’ll think I was totally on top of it the whole time.

I have some serious overdue fines at the library, but I have three library cards (one for me and one each for the kids) so I’ll just use whoever’s doesn’t have anything owed to it.

I love formula feeding. I love the convenience, the ease of making up bottles ahead of time, and I love that my husband and I share morning wake up duty so that we can each get a break.

I like the fact that I’m a young mom. I get kind of smiley when I’m out and people find out I’m a mom and they’re shocked. Maybe it’s the 5′ tall petite frame I have, but I love it and it makes me love being a mom even more.

I have a hair that grows from a freckle on my arm that I sort of like. I don’t trim it until a close friend of mine or my husband tells me enough is enough.

I take care of myself and want my baby to be healthy, but I don’t enjoy being pregnant. Tough to write, but it’s true.

I still yell at my son too…and sometimes my husband. It’s not a lot, but it happens.

I could care less how my feet look. I’m a runner, so they’re not pretty. I only get pedicures because my feet gross out my friends and husband.

My bathroom is pretty messy. I clean it…but not as much as I should.

I’m a breast feeder and I love it. I love that no one else gets to do this with my daughter but me. I love that I can produce all the nutrition she needs for now. I love the snuggle time it allows us. However, I hate to pump and don’t overly stress about doing so, yet I absolutely hate when my in-laws feed her formula when they watch her a couple of times a week. I don’t believe there’s anything wrong with formula, but I have a possessive thing about feeding her breast milk and hate when I can’t be the one to feed her. Yes, I could somewhat avoid this if I pumped, yet I can’t bring myself to find time in the day to do so so I let this possessive feeling linger and I hate that I do that.

A confession about my body? It’s had a funny smell ever since I’ve given birth and I’m not sure what that’s from. I’ve previously mentioned taking fenugreek and how that can make you smell like syrup, and I suppose that could be the culprit, but what I notice doesn’t smell like syrup and it really bothers me. I often wonder if other people notice it and think I just don’t shower often.

I can really get an attitude (usually only with my husband the poor guy!)

I do yell sometimes and I hate that.

My house is only clean when company is coming over. It drives me crazy but not crazy enough to clean regularly.

I do not usually make my bed.

I have a really hard time remembering names and am not always the best listener (working on this).

I let my kids watch too much tv and eat too much junk.

I sometimes watch the kardashians and jersey shore.

I still buy clothes from the juniors department.

Breast-feeding grossed me out until I had a baby. I did it for both of my daughters and was fine with it but it completely ruined my boobs.

I didn’t like being a mother at first, and it took me a while to bond with my son (which really took me by surprise). At around 5 months I liked being a mother, by 10 months I loved it. I still don’t identify with the word mother though…and don’t have a lot of other “mommy friends” (I really hate that term…another confession).

I thought I’d really like making baby food, and I didn’t. He didn’t like it anyways, so I was totally fine with breastfeeding him as often, because it was way easier. He now eats table food without issue.

9 times out of 10 I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing parenting wise. I have to learn that my instinct will guide me.

I let both my kids watch TV and l love that they love it. I think it’s cute when they talk back to Dora or sing the ABCs the Super Why way.

I let them eat cereal at least once a week for dinner.

 

 

 

 

 

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