It’s been almost four years since that June morning and I am no longer depressed. I have a second son now and didn’t have postpartum depression with him. I have since bonded with and love both of my boys more than anything in my life. My bond is strong and secure with my sons.
I am happy.
My sons are happy.
So when did my PPD go away? I’m not exactly sure. I suppose it gradually got better with time and antidepressants. By my son’s first birthday I guess I felt “better” or at least better adjusted. By this, I mean I looked forward to spending time with him, I felt a connection with him, and that “mother/son” bond had been formed. I was able to sleep again, and I wasn’t constantly obsessed with thoughts and worries. I (somewhat) came to terms with the fact that I will never again feel the kind of “normal” I did pre-children and this was my new normal.