A Baby Story

Jan 29, 2016 by

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I was not one of those “glowing” pregnant women.  Not even close.  The only potential for glowing would have had to come from the millions of highly combustible particles orbiting my miserable, furious, fat head.

My pregnancy gave rise to the greatest joy of my life, but the months up to the arrival of my son were the most stressful I have yet to experience.  Little man is now turning 2, which I hear means I’m in for a world of hurt in the very near future.  As of this moment, however, pregnancy was the hardest thing I’ve been through, both physically and emotionally.

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Dear Baby, You Are Wise

Dec 14, 2015 by

Dear Baby,

Well.  Here we are.  Still living in the same body.  I can’t say I thought I would be blogging this week – I figured that by now I would be kissing your toes and drinking in your smell (well, realistically, that you’d be expelling bodily fluids onto me and keeping up all night).  But just when I think I know what to expect, parenting always seems to knock me on my ass bum.  (Literally.  I spend most of my time on my ass bum right now.)

It struck me in one of my less hysterical moments over the last few days that you are not even born yet – you are NEGATIVE days old – and yet, you have taught me so much.  You are incredibly wise, baby.  I feel like I’m incubating Yoda.

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Pregnant Lady PSA

Nov 30, 2015 by

36 weeks!!! (Selfie cred: E. Gonzalez)

36 weeks!!! (Selfie cred: E. Gonzalez)

My hospital bag is packed.  My birth class is done.  Newborn-sized clothes are washed and ready in their drawers.  I am 36 weeks pregnant and basically ready to have this baby.  Based on my birth history (my daughter was 2 weeks early) and my mom’s birth history (my brothers and I were 2, 3, and 7 weeks early), I’ve been told that she could arrive almost any time now.  Which means that this might be my last blog post as a mom of 1!  How to leave you all while I take a short blogging hiatus??

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Do I Need a D&C? Decision Making and Self Advocacy During a Miscarriage

Nov 21, 2015 by

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Some of you are aware of my recent pregnancy loss. Because I had never miscarried until now, I learned a lot in the process and wanted to share my experience in case someone may benefit from the story.

While I think the title serves as a sufficient trigger warning, I will emphasize here that you may not want to read this if you’re struggling emotionally with a completed miscarriage. I got through the incident with relatively little emotional pain, so I worry that my clinical account of the experience may seem flip to those who are grieving a loss of any kind. I’m writing this because I was pressured to go to the hospital for a dilation and curettage procedure, aka a D&C, and I want other women to know how I made the decision to refuse the surgery in case they are in a similar situation. I spent a lot of time doing research online about the procedure and my options in terms of medical interventions and alternatives, so if this post pops up in the future, I hope someone will find it helpful.

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Working Moms, Why Do You Work?

Nov 7, 2015 by

piggy bank

I announced my third pregnancy somewhat earlyish, on this blog, a while ago.  Several days ago, I lost the pregnancy.  I would like to do a more in-depth post about the miscarriage because I had not realized the many factors and decisions involved in going through that process.  Someone out there might benefit from reading that story if they are going through something similar.

But for now, I’m just doing what my energy level will permit:  reflecting.  I’m moving past the loss, and I feel a bit silly using the word ‘loss’ because this pregnancy seemed more like a series of events than a thing to have acquired and then lost.  Life just moves on and everything is ok, really, at least for me.  A few days afterward, my boss emailed me to let me know I use too many commas when I write.  And I was annoyed, but only in the typical annoyance way that was over the next minute.  And things are fine.

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