Well, I am truly sorry to disappoint you folks, but I do not have any secrets to tell. Nope… I’m a gold star mom. Some might even refer to me as perfect.
Ok… here’s the dirt. Hopefully at least ONE of you can relate to one of my confessions! Here goes nothin’…
1. I have a recurring fantasy. It’s not even the 50 Shades of Grey kind. Picture this: I enter into a hotel room. My kids are home with their daddy. It is just me, myself, and I and a bed that I can have a glorious
8 or 9…. 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep. No dinner to make. No laundry to do. No crying, whining, screaming. Peace & quiet. An escape from reality. Until that day though, I’ll just keep dreaming.
2. If my daughter picks a book that I don’t really feel like reading (or I’m really tired and it just seems like too long of a book) I will skip A LOT and make it up as I go. Of course I can only do this with the books she hasn’t memorized! Confession 2b. I love children’s books! I even dream of publishing one of my own someday. However, I really do not care for The Berenstain Bears books. There…I said it.
3. I am often VERY relieved when my husband takes over the bedtime “duties” with my 3-year-old (reading, cuddling, tucking in). I love doing ALL of those things but more so during the day when I’m not as exhausted. Refer to #2 above.
4. I hate cooking AND cleaning. I sometimes feel that I play the working mom card a bit too much. (i.e. “I’ve worked hard all day. Let’s just go out to eat.” or “I’m tired from working. I’ll just clean the house at some point this weekend.”) Side note: usually the real cleaning does not happen unless we are expecting company.
5. Sometimes, I just thank God for the convenience of McDonald’s. Yes, my 3-year-old can spot those golden arches from a mile away!
6. I battle with a little bit of guilt that I have not suffered from postpartum depression after the birth of my second daughter like I did after my first. Reason being that I realize now all of the joy I missed out on with my first little girl. You can read about my experience with postpartum depression in my Dirty Little Secret post.
7. I do have moments every now and then where I really miss living a selfish lifestyle. By this I mean not having to worry about finding childcare. Coming and going whenever and wherever I please. Having more money to spend on things I WANT as opposed to what the KIDS NEED. And then I get a hug, or see a smile… and I get over it. Hey, I’m only human right?
8. I would be a stay at home mom if we could afford it. (But I would still have my kids go to daycare at least a couple of days a week so I could do things that I need/want to do. I would also hire a cleaning service AND a personal chef. A girl can dream right?)
9. I have been having some regrets lately about getting my tubes tied. I really don’t even think I would ever want to have a third child so I really don’t know why I sometimes feel that way. Maybe it’s just the realization that I know I can’t have another child even if I changed my mind.
10. This past Christmas, most of the gifts we gave my youngest are hand-me-downs that used to be my oldest daughter’s and pretended they were new.
11. When my daughter wants to play games on my phone and I really don’t want her touching it, I will lie and say the battery is dead.
12. Sometimes I wish my daughter liked watching television more. I am usually happy she prefers puzzles or playing outside as opposed to sitting in front of a 90 minute movie. But I have to admit I would welcome an opportunity to get some things done around the house (or even a chance to get a little crafting time in) while she sits happily plopped on the couch engaged in some kid friendly programming.
13. When nursing my youngest, I had my oldest daughter calling my breast milk “boobie juice” just because it made me laugh every time she said it. So mature, right?
14, I am terrified of the day my girls enter their teens. Really terrified. And they are only 8 months old and (almost) 3!
Ok… now that you have had the chance to read some of my confessions, I want to hear some of yours! C’mon…spill the beans!