Socks and Shoes: A Love Story


“You always tell me what to do! You never listen to me!”

I thought I had years before I heard this statement being screamed at me by an emotional girl.  But that’s the phrase of the week coming from my 6-year old.  Lately, she has been pushing all of my buttons.  I feel like I’m asking myself several times a day “What has gotten into her lately?”



The worst is when it’s time to put on socks and shoes in the morning. This morning, it took two grown-ups, a pair of shoes in the trash, and a lot of yelling to get my daughter to put on her socks and shoes. WTF? Why is this so hard? Every. Morning.



You can picture this, right? I’m questioning my parenting and pulling out my hair. My husband has to be bad cop again and that just sucks. Zoey is in tears and that sucks too. Shoes get thrown in the garbage. We’re going to be late. Again.

panic now


But she just won’t listen. So I’m yelling, she’s crying. Then, stop the presses. She needs a hug. “RIGHT NOW! Don’t you love me? I just wanna HUG!!”  You will not distract me, child.  Wait, what were we doing? Oh right. Put your socks on!



I need relief, some advice, anything!  (It’s too early to drink, right?)  How do I get these damn socks on this flailing beastie!?  I want to call my friends and get some advice, but they’re in the same boat.



And then, once the dust settles, a serene calm blankets the land… and the shoes and socks are on!  Angels AND birds are singing.



We’re feeling really good about this parenting. We’re surviving. Hell, we’re THRIVING!  We. Have. Got. This. *Fist Bump*

high five


Until tomorrow.


9 comments on “Socks and Shoes: A Love Story”

  1. When she says no, send her to camp (or school) barefoot with shoes and socks in a bag next to her in the car. I bet she’ll decide to put them on herself on the way. DO NOT ENGAGE. She will recognize the consequences of showing up barefooted and will make a smart choice by herself. If she doesn’t decide to put them on, bring the bag into the building with you and hand it over. It will be dealt with when she gets there. This is not passing the buck, its a natural consequence for the choice she is making. This has happened at school for me before and it’s just a matter of the teacher saying, “ok, now that you’re here, please do such- and-such. I’ll check with you (on your progress) in a minute.” Then I go do something with the rest of the class and by the time I swing back, voila. Done. It’s so different when the teacher requests that the whatever-it-is gets done.
    If she refuses to get dressed and you are late, just throw the freaking clothes in the car and go. She can dress in the car before she goes in. She will learn that it is much less embarrassing and convenient to dress at home!
    Another example of this is when a student refuses to do homework at home. I tell parents NO TEARS AT HOME BECAUSE OF HOMEWORK. They should just write me a note that the child was refusing to do it and I will make sure it gets done at school (and I tell the student they JUST have to do it during recess before they can go out. (Very matter of fact and a logical consequence) and I stick to this. They are allowed to go out as soon as they’re finished and by the way, it usually takes them about 5 minutes 😉
    This allows parents a break from arguing and tension at home but gives the kids the message that they will still be doing their homework but at the expense of their free time. More times than not, I am told, when a parent tells their child, “OK you don’t have to do it then, I’ll just write Ms. Nucci a note” they decide to do it. They don’t want to miss ANY recess AND they don’t want to disappoint me, so I’ve heard ❤
    Logical consequences, consistency, and few words are so important.
    By the way, I hope you didn't give her that hug mid tantrum. Very manipulative! :LOL!
    Have you considered a reward system?
    Kriste, these are just my opinions and things that have worked for me over time. Parenting is very hard, especially with a headstrong girl ❤ Hang in there.

    1. As always, you’re so wise! We actually started talking to her about reward (15 min of tv) for good behavior. We (mom and dad) need to get on the same page about it first as far as what constitutes good behavior so we’re specific and consistent.
      She’s very headstrong. Not sure where she gets it from…

  2. Love this! I am laughing really hard right now because we go through the same thing here and there! Hence my 6 year old wears 4T socks with grippies under (way too tight), and beat up sneakers that should be in the trash… Thanks for making me feel “normal”!

  3. Oh Kriste, I am right there with you. I don’t know what to do. Every single little thing seems like it’s a struggle right now. What is going on!??! And I really hate hearing that this doesn’t get better when your kid is six!!!

  4. Awesome! Love your sense of humor! We also run into the issue of pulling into daycare, running late from “incident” back at the house, go to get her out of the back of the car to see that SHOES HAVE BEEN REMOVED. Wtf, indeed.

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