One of my closest friends gave birth to her third bundle of joy not too long ago. I have other friends who have just had their first or second baby, and I also just recently attended my cousin’s baby shower. Needless to say, I’ve definitely got baby on the brain!
Let me just back up for a second here. My husband and I have decided, beyond a reasonable doubt, NOT to have another child. We have two amazing little girls and our family truly feels complete. And, yes even though we “didn’t try for that boy.” Thankyouverymuch. Don’t get me started on that comment because I could probably write a whole other blog post on it.
For whatever reason, since the time I first thought about having children of my own one day, I have had my mind set on having two children and that was that. I pictured my future with a husband and two kids. I had a plan that felt right for me (and my husband).
But how do you really know when your family is complete; whether or not you should add more children to the mix? It’s a question I hear quite often from other mom friends. It’s even come up amongst my fellow CTWM bloggers. How do we know when it’s time to call it quits in the baby-making or baby-adopting department? Quite frankly, I’m not convinced there’s a clean-cut answer for this one. Sorry! I think one person’s answer can be different from another’s, yet just as right. For some, the deciding factor can be a financial one, maybe health concerns or other extenuating circumstances, while others just feel their family is whole as is and don’t want to change it; possibly even a combination. Whatever it may be, it’s the right decision.
As for me, it was a combination of financial concerns, the emotional stress of adding another child to care for, and the fact that stopping at two felt right for us. I have no regrets about our choice to have two children. I know my family is complete every time I’m around my girls. Their hugs, smiles, goofy antics, and just their presence alone make my heart swell with such love and gratitude. I belong to them just as much as they belong to me. I can’t, and would never want to, imagine our family as anything other than what it is. It’s certainly not perfect; it’s just whole.
I am a firm believer that we end up with the family we are meant to have, whether that means one child or six. If my second child had turned out to be twins instead, I know in my gut that I would be just as happy…okay, maybe after the initial panic attack or two.
Being around all of my friends and family members and their new, or soon-to-be, babies make me feel all the more confident that we made the right decision. I’m not holding newborns longingly and wondering if we made the right call or wishing we could have another baby. Instead, I’m thinking to myself how great it is to be around these little ones, and still be able to have the whole baby experience vicariously through them. Then I let out a small sigh of relief knowing that I get to give them right back to their parents because this mama’s baby factory is officially closed.