This past week was a tough one for me.  Both of my boys were sick.  They had horrible colds and coughs that kept them up at night, their noses turned into non-stop faucets, and the little one had an ear infection (probably for longer than he should have because I chalked up the fever to the cold.)  Oh yeah, and I was sick too, but as you know, we Mommies aren’t allowed to be sick.  So I chugged cough syrup, popped aspirins and spent the week not sleeping and covered in baby boogers.  Needless to say, it wasn’t my favorite week ever.

And then Sunday came.  December 14^th.

Two years ago, December 14^th was a Friday. I remember the day so well.  The weather was very similar to this year’s.  Hub and I took a half day from work and went out to lunch.  We started to see the Facebook status updates (something about a school shooting?) but we decided to put our phones away and enjoy each other’s company.  It was so rare we had any time alone anymore since we had an 18 month old.  On our drive home our happy faces froze as we heard the news.  My husband cried.  I was numb.   I called my daycare provider.  She had locked all the doors and was hugging all the kids.  I went to pick up my son.  I watched the news.  Hub was still crying.  I was still numb.

I read something a first responder said that will forever haunt me.  He said the worst sight was not the dozens of bodies.  The worst thing he saw that day was the look on the parents’ faces when they realized their baby was not running out of the building into their arms.  Two years later, I still have yet to completely process my feelings about that day.  When I start to think about it, really think about it, the emotions become too overwhelming.  What if I was one of those parents?  What would I do?  No.  Stop.  I can’t.  Can’t think.

But you and I weren’t one of those parents.  

You and I can still hug and kiss and hold our baby.  So do it.  Hug and kiss and hold them.  Tell them “I love you” over and over and over.  Tell them how special they are all the time.   Always remember.   Be thankful every day you can still do these things.  Be thankful on the good days, the bad days, the sicks days and the tantrum-filled days.  Never take it for granted.  Ever.   

It is the only thing that matters.