Or, otherwise entitled, “Take me OUT OF the Ball Game: Adventures in Parenting Toddlers in the Wild.”  By, Marie & Erin.

Erin and I live dangerously.  You may remember us from such tales as, “Taking Children to real life restaurants and living to tell about it,” and, the Mom Classic- “ESCAPED- one night out in public without children”

The 4th of July brings us to another tale.  We brought the brood to a New Britain Rock Cats baseball game over 4th of July weekend.  It was a great idea!  We had a Groupon ticket deal- the seats were AMAZING- right behind home plate, and the weather forecast promised a cool, bright evening, not a rain cloud in sight.

Going into this adventure we had no expectations.  Not even LOW expectations- we had NO expectations.  The idea being, if the kids were going to be running around like drunk elves on the day after Christmas, we were going to pull the escape valve and get the HELLZ OUTTA DODGE.  No judgment.  Just get to the goodbyes and see ya back at preschool on Monday.  We are not heroes, people.  We are SMART.

Once we all arrived at the stadium, Erin and I had a little pre-game pep talk, said a few hail marys that our kids would not destroy the park, themselves, or the fans around us, took a deep breath, and walked into the stadium.  (Wait- What, you don’t say a trifecta of hail marys that your kid doesn’t cause a scene out of Double Dare? Oh, just me?) Moving on…

We grabbed a few freebies at the marketing booths, a few hot dogs, and the legs of the person in the Cookie Monster furry costume, (SORRY, PERSON IN FURRY COSTUME!) and made our way to a shaded tree just along the first base line.  The kids, I have to say, were being great.  They were being kids!! Running around, eating hot dogs, drinking (and spilling) water, and I swear they thought we were freaking the best parents EVER for taking them to this glorious place.  (And we hadn’t even made it to our seats yet).

After dinner, all 4 of us parents put on our game faces and said, “LET’S DO THIS,” and brought the kids into the center of the hurricane.  (DUN DUN DUN)…

I wish I could say we saw the fireworks at the end of the game.  Hell, I wish I could say we lasted long enough to do the 7th Inning Stretch.  We did see two home runs in the first inning, though!!  And not much after that.  Before you start jumping to conclusions here, let me say this- the kids were FLIPPING AWESOME.  They were dancing in their seats!  They were shaking their bootys all over the place!  There were- wait for it- wait for it- NO TEARS!!!!!  The kids just wanted to be kids.  They wanted to roam free and dance to the music.  And who can blame them!?  They genuinely love hanging out with each other.  Those seats could not contain that kind of excitement!

So…… we all made the executive decision to grab soft serve in souvenir helmets, find that shaded tree, and let the kids do what they want- dance, run around, eat ice cream, and, um, be kids!  After everyone had their fill, and eyes looked heavy, we headed back to the parking lot to find our cars, and call it a night.  Success? Erin and I definitely think so! Oh, and Hartford Yard Goats– You are officially on notice- we’re comin’ at ya next summer!!