Tag: foster care

Dear Hurting Child

My Sweet Child, We are finding ourselves once again in a familiar dance. The catalyst being the bruising of your tender places and the grand finale undoubtedly containing quite the bang. When you were young, I would sit in the middle of your room as you spiraled and raged around me. Silent and still, just sitting…waiting.

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A Letter To My Foster Son’s Former Foster Parent

If I was writing this letter two years ago it would have been written very differently. I probably would have berated you for the choices you made. I would have accused you of not trying hard enough to connect with the child in your care, and I would have told you how unimpressed I was with your decisions. There is a good chance that my words would have been unkind and hurtful.

Confessions of a Working Mother: Tips For New Foster Parents From a Foster Mom and Foster Son

I have officially been a foster mom for an entire year. In that year I have learned many valuable lessons that I would like to share with you here. In addition, I have included a section written by my 15-year-old foster son. He has been in homes other than mine, and has used his life

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Why Paid Family Leave is Important to Me

I recently came across Scary Mommy’s article 6 Reasons The Family Medical Leave Act is Bullshit and, man, did it resonate.  I’m a happy mom of 3 thriving children.  Life is crazy, but manageable. I’ve never really resented being a working mom…that is, except for when it comes to the few first precious months of my

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A Prayer for My Children

Less that half of former foster youth are employed at 23, and only 3 percent have finished college (compared to 28% of the general population with a BA or higher). The teen birth rate for girls who’ve been in foster care is more than double the rate of their peers outside the foster care system. Foster care alumni are

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A Letter to My Adopted Son: On Having to Share You

November is National Adoption Month and with this, I add my truth to all the rest that is bravely being spoken. “I didn’t give you the gift of life; life gave me the gift of you…” To my son, The other day you told me that sometimes you want to be “un-adopted”. It broke my heart, but I

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To 4 Or Not To 4…

Our social worker stopped by for a quarterly home visit yesterday and mentioned that our foster licence will be up for renewal in a few short months.  As he started handing over the stacks of paperwork that would need to be completed for renewal, he stopped himself and asked, “Wait, do you want to renew?”

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Post-Adoption Depression

Go ahead and start typing “post adoption” into Google.  If yours is set up like mine, to give you short-cuts to the most popular search terms, your first option will be Post Adoption Depression. Here. Here. Here. Here. No shit.  This is a real thing.  I’ve spent years in the foster and adoption community.  I’ve completed

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